Tonight Show - Will it Tea?

Worlds are colliding, Jerry!

The Star Wars Holiday Special

Have you heard of The Star Wars Holiday Special? Star Wars is such a huge phenomenon and Christmas is such a huge holiday, you'd think it'd be common knowledge. But it's a testament to how unbelievably awful the special is that it's almost completely unknown.

And it is unbelievably awful. I've watched it two or three times in my life and I can't remember hardly anything about it. It's as if my brain recognizes it as psychological poison and actively purges it from my memory for my own good.

The Red Letter Media show "Best of the Worst" devotes two entire episodes to The Star Wars Holiday Special and they are two of my favorite things on the internet.

A few cursory notes to be aware of. The Star Wars Holiday Special first (and last) aired in 1978 - the year after the first movie was released to theaters. It actually aired before Thanksgiving of 1978. It would seem that the "Holiday" it refers to would be Thanksgiving but over the years that distinction has been lost and it's assumed to mean Christmas.

The special mostly focuses on Chewbacca's family who speak in barks and growls for long stretches with NO subtitles. In addition to incomprehensible noise and brief cameos by the real Star Wars cast members, it also stars people all the kids in the 70's wanted to see - Bea Arthur, Harvey Korman and Art Carney.

Without further ado, a "round table discussion of the Star Wars Holiday Special". Sure it's 43 minutes long (80 minutes if you watch part 1 - which is also hilarious), but you know sometime this week you'll need something to watch. Happy Life Day...



"Not-Diana-Ross singing some kind of erotic soul song to an elderly Wookie who's [...] in a science-fiction machine - that's not what comes to mind when I think of Christmas."

Conan - Minty's Covered in Poo

Conan - Brian Huskey

Brian Huskey was on Conan recently. Normally, that wouldn't mean anything to me - I don't know the name, I don't know what he's in, I don't even know what he's promoting. But it turns out that he was the "go to" for Spock in Conan's "Late Night" days.



Brian played Spock? I got you covered...



Oh man, I hate his whole "slacker attitude".

Conan in Berlin

Korea, China and Japan

Not funny but I find these videos to be very interesting.

I recently watched the movie "Under the Sun", which is a documentary filmed in North Korea with the blessing of the North Korean government. North Korean "documentaries" are strictly censored by the government, meaning that they're careful lies - they depict actors reciting scripted lines and living happy lives. The whole time I was watching the documentary, I couldn't help but wonder what these people really think. If they were free to tell the truth would they really be toeing the party line or are they aware of the farce?

And this is the value of this youtube video - it's interviews with people who were able to leave that regime and can now speak freely.



The second video is just a nice sociological insight. The Korea, Japan and China have a long history of mutual hatred, mistreatment and racism. So they ask Japanese people on the street about whether those historical resentments survive today.

Jontron - Drug PSAs

Shoutout to Lou Albano and Philly 57.



The time is now for strong leadership. Reagan for President.

The Tonight Show - Nicole Kidman Returns

Are you a glutton for awkwardness? Do you enjoy embarrassed tension? Sure, we all do. Then you're going to love the new Nicole Kidman interview.

This is Kidman's first appearance since revealing that she went on a non-date with Jimmy a long time back.

Conan - Youtube VR Lab

Conan visits the Youtube Virtual Reality Lab.

Tonight Show - David Blaine

Why are The Roots "helping out" for the David Blaine magic segment? I think it's because they know exactly what they're doing.

It's funny, then, that Jimmy is still the most expressive.

Continue - Shaq Fu

Remember the ancient oriental martial art known as Shaq Fu? It swept the nation world in the mid-nineties before the folks at Delphine Software decided to exploit it for financial gain.

Well, in honor of Election Day, here's the episode where the guys of Continue sit down and play Shaq Fu.



Go in peace, bra.

Tonight Show - Mad Lib Theater

Tonight Show - Vince Vaughn

The always great Vince Vaughn.

Conan in Harlem

Conan takes a camera crew to explore Harlem.


Conan did this same remote in his Late Night days and usually this is where I would link the classic one but I can't find it. It may be lost to time. I think that was one I even had on VHS.

Halloween - 1

As I write this, the light is on and the bowl of candy is on the table. No one's come by in a while so I think it's over. For the night I answered the door 9 times 10 times for 23 total 25 total trick-or-treaters. Possibly a new record.

And now a word about etiquette and protocol. I'm amused by how many kids just take as much candy as they wish to take. I always thought it was accepted that it's one piece each. Is this not the case? Do the kids today have an increased sense of entitlement? Or is it my fault... am I supposed to tell them to only take one. If so, that seems like a lot of work.

The designated activity for this year is re-visiting "I Know What You Did Last Summer". Seems like it requires a re-watch. Halloween doesn't have much to offer me: I don't have kids, I don't dress up, I don't like horror movies, but with IKWYDLS I can at least watch the prettiest girl of 1999, Ryan Phillippe.

But speaking of horror movies, the show Best of the Worst has a few Halloween episodes. This one stands out as it explains the origins of a certain photo that occasionally makes the rounds on social media...



It goes without saying that this is a movie review show in which some of the movies are NSFW so this movie is NSFW, by the associative property.

... And the sexy teens just decided to not report their hit and run to the police. I don't know that that's gonna be a good idea. This post is so long it's almost time for my Pon Farr...

Halloween - 2

Now that we're on the eve of Halloween, you might think it's time to really ramp up the fright. But I'm going to go the opposite direction and post unedited footage of a bear. Why go the horror route when bear footage is available?

So here it is... Unedited Footage of a Bear. Enjoy.

Halloween - 3

I mentioned yesterday that I was not aware of "Are You Afraid of the Dark" when it was around. Unlike that show, I WAS aware of the Goosebumps phenomenon while it was going on. But even so, I didn't read a single page of it or watch the TV show that it spawned.

But fortunately for me there's a podcast where adult men read a Goosebumps book originally intended for children and then discuss and analyze it. The podcast is called Goosebuds and it's a fun listen.

For an introduction, I recommend Episode 16 - Be Careful What You Wish For.

Although the show starts with Culling Plans and Super Soldiers, you can skip to 13:45 if you want to get straight to the book.

Halloween - 4

In a special two-part episode, Jontron re-examines the nineties kids' show "Are You Afraid of the Dark?"

I was not aware of this show when it was airing (was it on cable? I didn't have cable) but it sounds like I may have missed out on some sweet Canadian accents. I love that long "A". Sometimes I go around my house saying "The tale of the phaantom caab."

Halloween - 5

The guys at Continue? play "Bram Stoker's Dracula" for the Sega Genesis. Oooohhh, spooky scary!

In the Air Tonight

I'm not a huge fan of "In the Air Tonight". I've heard it too many times on the radio and find myself mostly bored.

But the key here is that for this performance, Collins was going to be backed up by The Roots and Questlove was extremely nervous about having to play the most famous drum fill of all time. Check out desk chat for Monday and Tuesday to hear him talk about how nervous he was. And to increase the pressure, the show dedicated a camera (or several) specifically to focus on him.

"If you mess that drum fill..."
"I'm done."

So here it is.

Happy St. Crispin's Day

About this time every year people are probably looking forward to the bigger holiday that happens next week (Reformation Day). But we shouldn't overlook St. Crispin's Day. St. Crispin's Day is the day wear we all appreciate Brian Blessed's chainmail fashion and mourn the loss of Davy Gam.

Star Trek / Star Wars

Menagerie

It's just a fact - and I've accepted it - that there are cats wandering around my property. I don't know where they come from, who owns them or if anybody owns them but they're just there. Sometimes, when I want to pull in my driveway, I have to wait for the cats to decide to move out of the way. Sometimes, I'll get my mail and a cat will be running away ahead of me. One time, I went into my garage at night and a cat bolted out of the darkness past my legs.

But then yesterday, I woke up to the sound of a rooster and it seemed like a "near" sound. It sounded really close. And sure enough, while backing my car out of the driveway, I see a rooster in the middle of the path, walking out of the way.

It's a whole new level now.

Friday

It's Friday Night. Feels like the perfect time to watch "Perfect Strangers" bloopers.  Obviously.

Conan - Norm MacDonald

More classic talk show Norm.

Conan - Hitting the Gym with Kevin Hart

Conan works out with Kevin Hart. It's funny that they've made a remote about something as mundane as the gym but I think that speaks to the confidence they have in Hart.

Incidentally, "football stadium" equals Lincoln Financial Field.

Tonight Show - Textual Experience

Sting joins Jimmy Fallon for "First Textual Experience".

Continue - Iron Commando

In this episode, Continue encounters the most pathetic character in all of vidya games: Huaco's Brother. Also, Nick reveals his "get rich quick" American flag scheme.

The Last Words of Presidents

The last words of every president.

Tonight Show - Do Not Play List

Jimmy recommends songs to NOT listen to.

Continue? - Mighty Morphin' Cheaters

The Continue guys play "Mighty Morphin Power Rangers: The Fighting Edition" for the Super Nintendo. And there is cheating and much references...

Feels like a Road House Saturday

Rifftrax recently released a new "three riffer" track for "Road House" (they had previously released one that was just Mike. Today felt like the day for it.... It could be my new Saturday night thing.

Paper covers Rock, Mijo.

I think the reason "Road House" has such timeless appeal is that even after multiple viewings, it still remains enigmatic. (Incidentally, this fact may be the only thing "Road House" has in common with "Citizen Kane".) The movie comprises two totally different tones but transitions from one to the other very slowly. I always wonder why they didn't keep it lighthearted and happy as we watch the Double Deuce succeed as a business. I'd sure love to see that movie. But instead the real end of the movie is a dark revenge story full of throat-ripping kill-murders. It's actually not far off from "Miami Connection" in that regard.

Hi, I'm here for karate hardware store practice.

Has there ever been a time or place where bouncers were legends, whose exploits were whispered in hushed tones from town to town? I'd love it if there was but it's hard to imagine. Has there ever been a business that turned around so completely due solely to the quality of the bouncers? Again, I hope so but it seems unlikely. This movie is part of the "rich guy has an iron grip on an entire town" genre that was so popular in the 80s. Did anything like this ever happen? What happened to the police, or any governmental authority for that matter?

Thought maybe we could have a picnic on my dress.

In the end, the Rifftax of "Road House" is quite charming and I recommend it. "Road House" is certainly the right movie for the Rifftrax treatment.

Stand By Me

Today I re-watched the film "Stand By Me" and I happened to watch it on the very day that it takes place. I wasn't meaning to do that, it was just a funny coincidence. Technically, it takes place over two days.

It's still a great movie.

I watched it when I was almost as young as the kids in the movie and now I've watched it when I'm about the age of the adult in the movie. I remember being a kid and thinking how sad and unthinkable the ending is. Now that I'm an adult, it's even sadder because it's not unthinkable.

Magic with The Roots

The Roots are always good for a tremendous reaction shot. I'd like to see an entire act with them. The venue would need really great fire exits.



Here's a previous appearance which elicits a similar reaction.

Free Fallin' - First Drafts of Rock

The lost first draft of Tom Petty's "Free Fallin'".

RIP Gene Wilder

Continue? - Sphinx and the Cursed Mummy

Have you ever wished video games had more swearing? Would you like characters from ancient Egypt who sound like their stereotypical New Yorkers? Well you're in luck...


Watch out for the visual of the Mehhh Spectrum.

Olympic Badminton

A brief discourse on the Olympic sport of Badminton. How is it played? What are the rules? How do you win?

Irish People Watch Good Mythical Morning

Ohhh, worlds are colliding!

What happens when a youtube channel that I watch, makes a video in which they watch another youtube channel that I watch? I'm watching a video of people watching another video.

It's just good craic, is what it is.



If you're unfamiliar with GMM, check out related posts on this webzone. This is the episode that first got me:



"That's the best voiceover for any commercial I've ever heard."

Game Grumps - Super Mario Maker

The entire episode is an unaware building. The ending is like another "Usual Suspects".

And it's kinda funny.

As usual, NSFW - language.

New Episodes of MST3K Will Be on Netflix

There's still some time left before we see any new episodes of Mystery Science Theater 3000 but the makers have announced where the episodes will be released. The show is coming to Netflix.

The new season is slated to begin in the Fall.

Conan V Andy

Rifftrax 10 Year Anniversary Highlights

Rifftrax is 10 years old and they've released a clip montage from the movies of the past 10 years. Enjoy.

Half in the Bag - Ghostbusters

"It's finally arrived. The most politically divisive film of the year. A f***ing Ghostbusters remake. Guess that's where we're at."



"Wait, I think there's an Electro-Voice Phenomenon.... Let's listen to it..."

Fussing and Fighting, My Friend

If you're friends with a couple and they get into a fight when you're around, I think it's the same feeling as when you were a kid and you'd be at a friend's house when their parents yelled at them.

Tonight Show - Father's Day Gift Ideas

Jim Gaffigan gives us gift ideas for Father's Day.

Note: Previous to this, Dwayne Johnson revealed that he had not eaten candy since 1989.

Irish People Eat

I have gone down a youtube hole and have not yet reached the bottom. I'm leaving this hear as a witness. If I never come out, tell the world my story.

The particular hole I've gone down is the "Facts." channel which is a series of "Irish People Eat ___" videos. It's somewhat cheap, it's pretty clickbaity, but I don't care because I enjoy it so much. Why do I enjoy it so much? I think I know but it's a long story...





Editor's Note: Philly Cheesesteak is the clear winner.



It's not all fun and games though. Certain videos like this one, you get the sense that the videos are more misinformation than education. I've been eating salt water taffy for all my life and have never even HEARD of Maple flavor. Perhaps it's a logistics problem where they can only get what they can get. The soda one is similarly frustrating. Again, maybe it's a problem of selection.

So what happens when I run out of videos? I already have a backup plan lined up...

Conan - Dudez-A-Plenti

An amazing classic, perhaps my favorite thing Conan's ever done.... Conan forms his own late 90s boy band a la "Making the Band", Dudez A-Plenti.

There's a version on youtube that's excellent quality but it's a cut up/edited version which - in my opinion - is like taking a hacksaw to the Mona Lisa.

This is the full version on vimeo. The quality is real rough but it's the original.



And of course there's the followup piece where they make their first music video. Such an underrated, under-known classic:

Letterman is Happy to be Retired

The full interview with Tom Brokaw will air Sunday, June 12 at 7 p.m.

Joe Jackson - Steppin' Out

Things are slow on the comedy front. Thought I'd post a song.

The internet has solved so many problems in life but once in a while you'll run into a question that can't be searched - an ungoogleable problem. I ran into one recently. I had a song in my head, I knew it was from the 80s, I knew the melody and one of the synth sounds but I didn't know the artist, the title, a single lyric or what it was about.

After much searching, I've found it. It's "Steppin' Out" by Joe Jackson. It's great.

SNL - Farewell Mr. Bunting

The odd thing about this is the age of the reference. Do the kids today know about "Dead Poet's Society"?

The odder thing about this is that SNL actually did something funny. Shocking.

E:60 - May 1, 2011

The major problem with ESPN's "30 for 30" movies is deciding which one watch. It seems like they're all amazing. Whether you have a passion for the subject or know nothing about it, the documentaries are so well done that they turn out equally as interesting.

Now there's a weekly show called "E:60" which is not really related but I'd call it a spin-off. They recently did an episode called "May 1, 2011".

It's rare that I'll witness a live event on TV, and rarer still that there's a historic event worth watching, but I was watching this one.

David Letterman's Screen Test for Airplane

David Letterman auditioned for the role of Ted Stryker in the movie "Airplane!" and the footage is on youtube.

The laughter you hear is the Late Night studio audience.

Star Wars Episode V Title Sequence

In honor of the new Radiohead album, here's an "alternate" version* of the "Empire Strikes Back" title sequence.

Watch in full screen.

Star Wars - Episode V "The Empire Strikes Back" Homage (Title Sequence) from KROFL on Vimeo.

* None of the Star Wars films have a title sequence.

When Radiohead released the song "Spectre" for free on Soundcloud, the message they posted with it ended with "May the Force be with you." for no apparent reason. Funny.

Continue - Combatribes

It is the future and there is time for... Combatribes.

The Continue guys battle through controller ineptitude to figure out if The Combatribes is worth playing.

Conan - Jordan Schlansky Product Review #3

Jordan Schlansky reviews the eFx Darth Vader replica mask. It's the most heated review to date.



There's a fun irony in what Conan says and I don't think it was intended. Conan jokes that someone on a Star Wars forum would be named "JubJub86". "Jub jub" is not a Star Wars term, it's just a nonsense sound that Conan likes to use for comedy. But because of this, because it's his word, he asked J.J. Abrams if he would work "jub jub"into the "Force Awakens" script. J.J. Abrams granted his request and so "JubJub" IS a Star Wars term and would be a forum name that someone would use.

Tonight Show - Styx Music Video Recreation

Jimmy and Paul Rudd remake of the classic video for Styx's "Too Much Time On My Hands."


For reference:




Paul Rudd is certainly no stranger to shot-by-shot remakes. 1, 2, 3, 4.

Tonight Show - Remembering Prince

Jimmy and Questlove talk about their experiences with Prince.

Game Grumps - This Summer...

The new non-horror trailer that's sweeping the nation.

Conan in South Korea

See the full episode of Conan's trip to South Korea here.

Conan Learns Korean

The youtube title for this video is "Conan Learns Korean and Makes it Weird". It's both self-explanatory and a bit of an understatement. Conan makes it real weird.

Conan in North Korea

Conan O'Brien becomes the first late night talk show to film in North Korea...or so the Germans would have us believe...


I like to think that the soldier wearing sunglasses indoors is like the North Korean Andy.

Conan - Jordan Schlansky Product Review #2

Haha..."#2".

In this episode, Jordan Schlansky endorses Preparation H Wipes.

Miracle Berry Review

April Fool's Day is stupid, let's face it.

But what if we played practical jokes on our own tongues? That could be a thing that almost works, how 'bout it? Ok, well the words will continue anyway.

Synsepalum dulcificum is a type of berry that originates in West Africa and one of the common names for it is Miracle Berry. Miracle Berries have a molecule (or several, probably) that binds to the tongue and alters one's sense of taste for a few hours. In particular, they affect the sense of sour and bitter. And I tried them tonight before taste testing a bunch of other food to see what would happen.

The big thing to note is that, going into it, you would hope to get some mind-melding combination where apples taste like rubber, orange juice tastes like carrot or snozberries taste like not-snozberries. I was disappointed to find that there's nothing like that. Everything still tastes basically the same, it just heightens or deadens the various components. And it's only sour and bitter - if you try foods that vary from those two components, they won't taste much different.

So for fruit, the overarching theme is that fruit generally tastes better after eating Miracle Berries. The strawberries taste better, apples taste like really good apples, watermelon is pretty much unchanged. Tomatoes taste different but it's hard to describe... I would say there's a pronounced "ketchup" flavor maybe. The big, bold red letter items that changed dramatically were lemons and limes. Miracle Berries have the effect of converting sour to sweet. If you eat a lemon - and you can just eat straight lemon with no problem - it tastes like sweet, sweet lemon candy... or like sweet lemonade. And a lime isn't that far off.

Another category people talk about is hot sauce. I tried some and it is pretty interesting. Under the influence of the berries, hot sauce is still hot but it's muted and the flavor is (I'd say) better too. It may have been sweet or it might have been flavorless. I don't remember exactly.

I also bought an assortment of sour candy for the occasion. Sour candy is a fun experiment. The Miracle Berry blocks sour receptors so the sour candy just goes back to being regular candy. Skittles Sours taste like sweet Skittles. Mike and Ike Zours: same thing. A Mamba Sour just feels like eating a cube of wax - it's interesting in the sense that it's so boring.

Other than the lemon, which is the #1 thing to try in my opinion, the most fun comes from the "bitter" end of the spectrum. At least it did for me. That's the area that I was most surprised. Drinking Apple Cider Vinegar, I could still register that it was vinegar but it was really close to tasting like just apple cider. Normally straight, pure cinnamon would be inedible but it tasted great. The most bitter thing I could think of was baking chocolate. I ate some when I was a kid, thinking that "chocolate" meant goodness. Of course baking chocolate is one of the worst things in the world, but with the berries, it pretty much tasted like good dark chocolate. That was trippy.

The effects last longer than I would have thought. It's now two hours later and I'm just about back to normal.

Tonight Show - James Spader's Kennedy Story

James Spader tells a story of hanging out at the Kennedy household.

Roger Ebert's Great Movies

When I was growing up "Siskel and Ebert"(the show as well as the critics) were very much in their heyday and I always found them fascinating. It seems to defy all logic that I did. I went to the movies maybe 2 or 3 times per year and there was a strict rule about only seeing movies rated G or PG. So why would a TV show where two guys discuss movies - movies that I hadn't seen and couldn't see - be interesting?

I'm not sure. I could analyze it but it's easier just to say I find movie discussion inherently interesting. Why did I love watching Bob Ross when I was never going to paint?

Roger Ebert came back to my consciousness again when I was going through the IMDB 250 list. I found some movies on the list to be absolutely unwatchable and devoid of anything worth celebrating. "How could people actually like this?", I'd wonder. But the IMDB 250 is a system of votes, not a person, you can't just ask unless you want to post that question on a forum and be dismissed as a "troll".

But I found Roger Ebert's "Great Movie" reviews online and they were the key. Even if I disagreed, even if I was absolutely unchangeable in my hatred for a particular movie, Roger Ebert usually had an essay that explained what people saw in a particular movie, what was unique about it, how it changed the history of film. Like "Siskel and Ebert", whether we agree or disagree, the discussion is still interesting.

Last May I decided to watch every movie in Roger Ebert's "Great Movies" collection and read every review. There are about 372 entries and slightly more movies in the list. There's an inexact correlation between essays and movies because one entry might be a trilogy, one essay might be about the classic Warner Bros. cartoons, one entry, "The Decalogue" is really 10 movies, and so forth. But it's around 372 and as of tonight I've finished watching every movie and reading every essay.

Now that the list is completed, I'll continue missing Roger Ebert's film reviews... and Siskel's for that matter. It's strange how they could be so successful and yet no one has come along to replace them. Perhaps the modern world is happy using review aggregators, just skip the opinion and arrive at a number. One of the knocks on film critics is that people simply don't like to be told what to watch and what not to watch. I think that misses the point. The child version of me certainly didn't see it that way watching "Siskel and Ebert" on television and I don't see it that way now.

The different reactions that movies elicit reveal the differences in the people watching them. A movie watched alone is fine but how much richer is a movie watched, discussed and contemplated with others. Yes, watch any movie you want to see and avoid any movie you don't want to see, but read the review of someone you respect, regardless. The purpose of a worthwhile review is not to tell you what to do. The purpose is simply start the conversation.

Garry Shandling

If you're looking for a good Garry Shandling video, check out his episode of "Comedians in Cars getting Coffee".

Interesting that the name of the episode, released months ago, is named "It's Great That Garry Shandling Is Still Alive".

Post-Retirement David Letterman

Or... Santa. Or the fisherman killed by the sexy teens in a hit and run and they made a pact to never tell anyone.

Here's how naive I am... All those times Dave made those jokes about wearing a toupee, I thought he was just joking. I thought he just had bad hair so he made light of it by saying it was a toupee. It took me WAY too long to figure it all out.

Conan - Jordan Schlansky Product Review

Not a lot of product info in this one.


Ironically, Jordan gives more information about the Norelco Bodygroom 2038 in the video where Conan and Jordan attend couples' counseling.

Tonight Show - Spit Takes and Space Rock

Each of these is like half a video so the two of them together warrant a post.

First up is the Point Pleasant Police Department sketch. Is there a more threadbare conceit for a comedy sketch anywhere? I don't know of one. But the "writer's strike" clip is a good wink to the audience that they know that we know.



Oh, hey look who it is, it's Coldplay! Life on Mars.



Today I learned that the piano player on the original Bowie version was none other than Rick Wakeman. Nice.

Apparently Coldplay once asked David Bowie if he would sing on one of their songs. Bowie turned them down saying the song wasn't very good.

Conan - A Half Hour of Hannigan, the Traveling Salesman

Someone on youtube has compiled a full half hour of Hannigan, the Traveling Salesman sketches. Genius!



I hate to be "that guy" but this is when Conan had writers and cutting edge comedy. That Brian Stack could write so much dialogue with so many jokes is amazing. Just as amazing: he seemingly never stumbles in the lightning-fast delivery. I haven’t been this impressed since Bing Crosby starred in "The Country Girl". Der Bingle sure showed some acting chops in that timeless weeper.

The 2016 Cardboard Classic

The Cardboard Classic, in case you don't know, is the annual event where people make elaborate sleds out of nothing more than cardboard and glue and then ride them down a ski slope.

For all the known annual events and "viral videos" there are - as connected, digitally, as the world seems to be - this event still seems to be a well kept secret.

Aaaand Neil Breen's Got a New One

A new one?? How does he do it?!

Here's the trailer for Neil Breen's new (I don't mind pre-emptively calling it a) masterpiece, "Pass-Thru"...

Neil, you had me at the thumbnail.



Red Letter Media has released a new highlight video where Rich Evans describes the plot of one of Neil Breen's previous films, "Double Down".

NSFW.



And while we're on the subject of Red Letter Media and Trailers. Here's Jay's review of the new "Ghostbusters" trailer. He has a unique and interesting take on what we should expect...

Tonight Show - TGIF

As always, Friday night means TGIF on the Tonight Show.



Watch out for Urkel! That guy is always screwing things up!

Tonight Show - Steve Martin Doesn't Want to do the Show

Oscars 2016

Every year, ahead of the Oscars, I like to watch all the nominated films and pick my own winners. This year is no exception. I've watched all the Best Picture, Best Actress and Best Actor nominees and know (more or less) who I want to win.

I've done this for a couple years and the years in which I have correspond exactly to the years I'm not interested in watching the actual ceremony itself. You would think that having a "rooting interest" would make me more interested in watching but it's actually the opposite. I guess that knowing who you want to win takes away some of the "mystique" and a little bit of the "power" of the question "who will win?'

That's handy because the Oscar ceremony is exactly the same stuff every year. Every year people watch it and then complain about how long it was and how late it went. Every year the Academy agrees and takes steps to make sure it's shorter next year. And then the next year is always too long, and so on. It would make a great case study in cultural amnesia.

Best Actress

Nominees:

• Cate Blanchett in “Carol”
• Brie Larson in “Room”
• Jennifer Lawrence in “Joy”
• Charlotte Rampling in “45 Years”
• Saoirse Ronan in “Brooklyn”

I'm starting with this category because it's the least interesting. No, not because of sexism (though all women do look the same to me) but because I wasn't blown over by anyone. Mind you, there were good performances by good actresses this year, but there is no performance that stands out as particularly amazing.

In particular would be Cate Blanchett and Charlotte Rampling. It really seems that they were nominated solely because they've been nominated in the past and seem to be safe choices. I don't see anything in the movies themselves that would usually warrant a nomination.

My Pick: Brie Larson in "Room". This is my best choice in a weak year. She's very good.

Best Actor

Nominees:

• Bryan Cranston in “Trumbo”
• Matt Damon in “The Martian”
• Leonardo DiCaprio in “The Revenant”
• Michael Fassbender in “Steve Jobs”
• Eddie Redmayne in “The Danish Girl”

It appears that Leonardo DiCaprio is the front-runner in this category and I have no idea why. Not only did he not give the best performance of the year, he didn't give the best performance in the movie that he's in (Tom Hardy makes him look like an amateur). People seem to be under the illusion that Leo is a great actor. He isn't. He's actually a pretty bad actor but he's nonetheless a popular one. One thing's for sure, if it turns out that all you need to do as an actor to win an Academy award is make a "crawling and grunting in the woods" movie, next year's nominees are going to be interminable.

My Pick: Matt Damon in "The Martian". From what I've heard, this seems to be an unpopular pick and he has no chance of winning. But I have to be honest with myself - and I don't even like Matt Damon usually - and say that, for me, his was the strongest performance. The perception is out there that he just played Matt Damon, Super Scientist Man but that isn't what I saw. From happy to confident to shattered to weak to depressed, there is more range in this performance than any other and Damon does it flawlessly. That's what I thought.

Best Picture

Nominees:

• “Mad Max: Fury Road”
• “The Martian”
• “Spotlight”
• “Bridge of Spies”
• “Brooklyn”
• “The Revenant”
• “Room”
• “The Big Short”

This felt like an average-to-below-average year. The movies, as a group, are good but not great. One exception: I don't see how "The Big Short" was nominated; it belongs nowhere near this category and I have no idea why it was. Good for Adam McKay though. 

I was rooting for "Brooklyn" - it's the small, indie romance picture that would usually be my pick. But about three quarters into the movie, the plot takes a left turn which completely left me cold. Similarly, I went into "Bridge of Spies" with optimism because I like Spielberg and Hanks but it was just "okay". The story doesn't live up to the standard of the talent. 

"The Revenant" is pure hype and no substance. It's probably the favorite to win but only because people are blinded by how difficult it was to film. Yes, they filmed it in freezing temperatures using only natural light but judge the movie not the process of film-making. There is no underlying message, there is nothing learned and there's hardly any invested emotion. Sure, when Leo is injured and crawling through the snow you hope he makes it to safety but that's literally all there is to the experience.

My Pick: "Mad Max: Fury Road". It was a toss up between Mad Max and "The Martian". Both are action/sci-fi adventures, which would normally be a handicap, but both are executed so well that they're my top two picks.

In the end, I give the edge to Mad Max. The world it creates is so original, the tension and pace it maintains is so rare, the spectacle of the visuals and stunts is amazing. Love it or hate it, you have to admit that it's completely original and unlike anything else you've seen. And that's definitely the deciding factor for me. I normally wouldn't consider a goofy action movie for Best Picture but in an era of endless sequels, reboots and comic book movies, it's incredibly rare to be able to say "I've never seen anything like that before". Any time a movie makes me say that, I can feel pretty secure in calling it the best picture of the year.

Tonight Show - Mike Birbiglia

A small anecdote from Mike Birbiglia about heckling...

The Original Star Wars Crawl

The changes George Lucas has made to Star Wars over the past 20 years suck. Not only that, but anyone who wants to buy the original trilogy on DVD or Blu-Ray can't, because Lucas refuses to release anything but the ruined versions.

That's why a group of Star Wars fans began a project to release the original Star Wars movie from the original 35mm film. Pooling their money to buy a theater copy, they then went through the long process of cleaning the movie and transferring it to a digital form. This process is complete and their version has been released to the internet.

Finally, I can watch the original Star Wars movie that I've been watching since I was a kid... but there is one way in which the "original" is in a sense still "different"....

The fan-made version of Star Wars comes from a film reel from the original 1977 release of the movie. Since the text "Episode IV: A New Hope" was added to the opening crawl in 1981, and every version of Star Wars I've ever seen was after that, this means that I've never seen what the original opening crawl looked like to moviegoers when it first premiered in the summer of 1977.

Until now.

Star Wars Original Crawl 1977

Tonight Show - Vince Vaughn's Box of Lies

During the pre-game interview, Vince lets it be known that he knows what's REALLY going on. He also begins the psych out game.



The match:

Tonight Show - Fuller House and Donald Trump

Note: I am not posting this video because it is funny. I am posting this video because it's INSANE.

The only way to understand it is by breaking down the tape, second by second, like a football game or something. Get some coffee because it's going to be a long night.

Tonight Show Valentine's Day Anniversary Special

The Tonight Show aired it's 2nd Anniversary Special on Sunday.

You can watch it here.

Valentine's Day: Epilogue

That alien is not a reliable source of information. And that's the problem with aliens.

Rad Roundup '16

Well, it's Valentine's Day so let's take a look at what's happening in the world of "Rad"...

Heroes of Dirt

Bill Allen, star of the movie Rad, has a new-ish BMX movie, "Heroes of Dirt". Well, well, well, looks like the local boy thinks he's a pro.

Right from the start, the connections are apparent. There's a kid who loves BMX and dreams of competing in the Big Show with the professionals. The opening scenes show him trying to evade a police officer who, as it turns out, really cares for him. Oh, and his parents don't really approve of this BMX stuff either. Bill Allen plays the father.

But that's largely where the similarities end. This movie isn't intended to be a remake or reboot, but a movie of its own. It's actually a little surprising how little the plot really revolves around BMX - it's really more about kids stuck in a life of crime and it strangely turns into a kind of a heist thriller.

The part that was the biggest surprise to me is that the film takes place in Allentown, Penna. (Allentown? More like Bill Allentown.) I had vaguely heard of it for a few years but I didn't know it was being shot locally. I'm honored to have just been in the same state as Bill Allen, even if I was never aware it was happening. At one point someone goes to jail and the "jail" that he gets sent to is clearly Eastern State Penitentiary. That kid is going to do some hard time.

This is one of those low budget movies where they really do a pretty good job of hiding the fact that it's low budget even though it's inescapable. In particular, there are some weak acting moments. The cinematography is pretty excellent. Overall, it kind of constantly rides that line of good/bad so I wouldn't recommend it to everyone. I give it a pass though, I think you gotta take what you can get or you're screwed.

Turbo Kid

"Turbo Kid" is also a low-budget movie and also a movie that came out last year but, unlike "Heroes of Dirt" has no direct connection to the movie Rad. But the opening scene is a kid riding on a BMX bike to the song "Thunder in Your Heart" and we know what that's about....

"Turbo Kid" is a unique movie concept. It came out last year (as I said) but it's in the style of a post-apocalyptic 80s film set in the distant future of 1997. The style is an 80s era projection of what the future would look like. Think "Mad Max" but with a kid on a bike instead of a car.... and also with a sense of fun and some clever, comedic elements.

The movie strikes the perfect balance between paying homage to all those classic 80s hits and also not falling into the one-trick-pony "remember the 80s?" schtick. This is a smart movie with a nice sense of fun and really likable characters. It's got "heart". It's got heart AND it's got Michael Ironside with an eye patch.

But the real star of the movie, for me, is the completely synthesized score. The movie SOUNDS great.

I highly recommend seeing "Turbo Kid" but not to everyone. It's the kind of movie that you have to "get". You have to be on the same wavelength, but if you are, it's pretty great.

My Rad Career

“If Bill Allen was hanging from a cliff and I was holding him with one arm, and I was holding my girlfriend with the other, and I had enough strength to save them both, I would let go of my girlfriend just so I could make sure that I had a really good grip on Bill.” - Daniel Tosh

So says the promotional website for Bill Allen's new book. It also has a positive quote from the screenwriter of "Rad". "RAD" HAD A WRITER?!

Bill Allen has a new book out. It's an autobiography in which he talks about the making of "Rad", how he was cast and his days (apparently) hanging out with Brad Pitt and Brandon Lee. I haven't read it and I don't know that I ever will but I can't help but be curious.

Official Website.

The Most Satisfying Video in the World

Awwww yeah, it's time to take it down real low and feast your eyes on the most satisfying video in the world. Just kick back, relax, because this is the video where everything's cool, no one's getting uptight, no baggage or hangups, just keep things mellow, you do your thing and they do theirs.

This one's an all-skate.... All-Skate.



I once spent a good portion of the day watching the industrial egg seperator on a loop...

The Super Bowl of Schlock / Super Bulls

This post is part of a continuing mission to boycott every Super Bowl in which I don't have a rooting interest and replace the watching of it with various very non-Super-Bowlish activities.

(Pre-2011, 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014, 2015).

This year was kind of an off year. Firstly, I didn't really plan too much ahead of time - due to problems at work, I wasn't really fertile with imagination. Then, when the day came, I was stuck in bed, feeling the physical and psychological effects of some tainted ice cream I had eaten the day before.

In such a lowly state, the order of the day was simply finding something fun, something easy to watch, something low-key; finding the entertainment that best compliments a warm blanket and hot soup. For that purpose, what could be better than plowing through a "Best of the Worst" marathon on youtube?

In "Best of the Worst" the "gang" from RedLetterMedia watches three B-Movies (usually on VHS), discusses each one, analyzes them, breaks them down and then decides which movie is "Best of the Worst". If any movie is determined to be especially egregious, it will be destroyed in some creative manner.

In this episode, the gang watches movies from the dinosaur craze of the mid-nineties. This episode features Academy Award Winner Whoopi Goldberg and Academy Award Watcher Denise Richards.



There is also a sub-genre of "Best of the Worst" called "Wheel of the Worst". In "Wheel of the Worst", the guys put even worse and more bizarre VHS tapes on a wheel and spins it three times. The three movies that the wheel lands on are the three that they must watch.

This episode features the classic VHS "How Can I Tell if I'm Really in Love?" which stars Justine Bateman, Jason Bateman, Ted Danson and a step ladder. Or is there a step ladder? Either way, it's a star-studded affair. But even with that level of star power, it may not be enough to match "The Osteoporosis Dance" which features no stars (unless you count Tay Zonday) but does feature old people flailing about semi-randomly.

Part 2

Feeling slightly better, I was ready to take on some amount of excitement. So I watched Game 1 of the 1990-91 NBA Finals: Michael Jordan and the Chicago Bulls vs. Magic Johnson and the Lakers. Sometimes you just gotta relive the Michael Jordan glory days. Also the Marv Albert glory days, as he calls the game.

One of the great "bonus add-ons" that you get with this era is reliving the Chicago intro that featured "Sirius". From my memory, I thought the intro stopped at "Sirius" but I could have sworn I heard it transition fully into "Eye in the Sky" on this particular occasion. I THINK that's what I heard, I could be wrong.



The music fun didn't stop there. You know what music seriously dates the game? When "Hangin' Tough" played during a timeout. Man, oh man.

But then there were a lot of ways that 1992 has started to really look old. There were a large number of men in the crowd wearing pink shirts, for one. And the arena had a large banner ad for Winston Cigarettes. I wonder if those even exist anymore. Also, the cheerleaders were wearing the old-fashioned pleated cheerleader skirts that no one wears anymore. NBA cheerleaders these days wear... wait, what do they wear?

As for the game itself, it's a pretty good game. It was close, exciting till the end but the Lakers won. Oh well, the Bulls will hopefully bounce back. Game 2 takes place in a few days / 25 years ago.

And that was the Super Bowl for me.

Conan Reviews Video Games - Doom

Conan gets a few NFL players together to play Doom on the XBox One. That old chestnut.

Tonight Show - Puppies Predict the Super Bowl

Not so much funny as it is a chilling portent of things to come... In this segment of the Tonight Show, puppies predict the winner of Super Bowl 50.

Tonight Show - Is Something Happening?

For the week of 1/25, the Tonight Show aired new episodes Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday. Then aired reruns Thursday and Friday (1/28, 1/29).

Then this week (2/1), the Tonight Show will air reruns Monday, Tuesday and then return with a new episode on Wednesday.

This is unusual for a late night talk show - when they take a week off, it's usually not split across two weeks. And there hasn't been any news about going off the air for a new baby or because of an injury. There's also no explanation anywhere. Strange.

Tonight Show - Do Not Play List

Jimmy shares the latest edition of his Do Not Play-List.

I like that artist Wing. I think she may be going places.

Note To Hollywood: Coffee Cups

I don't understand why every time we see a Starbucks-like coffee cup in a movie or TV show, it's so obviously empty. If they want it to be empty because they don't want to pick up sloshing audio then fine - it's silly but fine - but how hard would it be to still give it some mass. I mean, we can put Matt Damon on Mars but we can't figure out how to make a paper cup appear not empty?

Classic Roots Choice #29

Well, sure, we should be a bit further than 29 at this point. This series took quite a hit at a certain point. It also doesn't help that there's no easy way to show the actual video (as is the case here).

Danny DeVito was on The Tonight Show to promote "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" so The Roots played the most Philadelphia song out there... the Action News Theme.

The only way to see it is by watching the full episode and even then, there's not much to see - it's a song after all. There's an article about the event here.

Tonight Show - Bob Dylan

I don't know how The Tonight Show can get a guest like 60s era Bob Dylan, but somehow they do. All I know is he's covering a song that I've never heard before and also that he's gone electric... so I guess we should boo him... and it's time for Levon to go work on an oil rig or something.

Conan Remembers David Bowie

The Tonight Show - Billy Joel

Billy Joel on the Tonight Show.



And with J.K. Simmons...