As the movie begins, the Munsters are visiting a wax museum and admiring their own statues. Immediately we're presented with two mysteries. First off, why do they have wax statues in a museum? In the Munsters Universe, they are not famous, as far as I remember. The movie doesn't explain. Secondly, their little boy Eddie who was about 12 in 1966, is still 12 in 1981. I don't get it, are they the same people? Are they not aging? Time travel? The 1966 movie created controversy by replacing the actress who Marilyn in the show and now both Marilyn and Eddie are both different.
So anyways, these wax figures exist but it turns out they're not just wax figures, they're actually robits. The owner of the museum (played by Sid Caesar, who the kids know from nothing) is using science to make the robots go out and commit crime. When witnesses describe the assailants, the police go after the Munsters. Now the family has to prove that they're innocent by convincing the police that it wasn't them, it was evil robot Munsterses.
The difference between this movie and the last Munsters movie is immediately obvious. Though the canned laughter is still missing, the absence isn't noticeable. This movie has better jokes, more jokes, funnier situations and snappier dialogue. It is still dumb, make no mistake, but it's dumb in the best way possible - it's The Munsters, what do you expect? If you see only one Munsters movie this holiday season, make sure it's "The Munster's Revenge!"
And special recognition to Fred Gwynne's performance as Herman Munster and the character in general. Watching the hulking mass act with naivety and gentleness is a pleasure to watch. He is the quintessential gentle giant. Gwynne was such an enjoyable, talented actor; it was unfortunate that he was typecast, though it's understandable in the sense that he was so good in this role. Either way, I'm glad "My Cousin Vinny" was as big a hit as it was, at least we got that.
"Baywatch Nights" is a laughingstock, a joke, the prototypical bad spin-off cash-in. If you are crafting a joke and need an embarrassing show that, nevertheless, people will recognize, I can think of no better punchline than "Baywatch Nights." That's why I watched every (available) episode. But what I found when I watched it surprised me in a number of ways...
Here's the first surprise: the first season is not really that bad. I really wanted the worst show out there and had to constantly admit that it just... isn't... terrible. Yes, on the one hand, it's not good enough to be a good show and I don't claim that it is good, but the sad fact is it's not bad enough to really be hilarious either.
"Baywatch Nights" follows Mitch Buchanan (David Hasselhoff) and his partners (played by Gregallen Williams and Angie Harmon) in their detective agency business. The formula for the show is obvious: every week someone comes in with a case/mystery and every week they catch the bad guys. In the early episodes, nothing is explained. Typically the first episode would be everyone meeting each other, explaining the backstory. The show has no backstory and particularly doesn't bother to explain how this is "Baywatch" aside from the existence of the character Mitch Buchanan. Presumably Mitch isn't a lifeguard by day and a detective by night because we see him doing detective work at night, but nor are we told that he's retired from lifeguarding. The show simply starts without explaining anything.
Throughout the show there's a "will-they-won't-they" between Mitch and Angie Harmon's character which is just as unexplained. Usually, when you put two characters together and show an obvious attraction between them, you also set up an obstacle that keeps them apart. This show sets up the obvious attraction between their characters, has them flirt, has them never becoming involved but gives no reason as to why. It isn't until the 8th episode where they "recall" that they had agreed some time in the past (not depicted) to not mix business with pleasure. Ok fine, you did the bare minimum, congrats, but that's still 7 episodes of "huh? why?"
There are a lot of parallels with "T and T." I get the feeling that this is the show that "T and T" would like to be - they both went for style, they're both detective shows revolving around solving a mystery, they're both cheesy but they both take themselves seriously. But whereas "T and T" had a general serious/downer tone, Nights is fun and generally lighthearted. Whereas "T and T" is the bad watching-tv-on-summer-vacation show, Nights is the acceptable watching-tv-on-summer-vacation show (acceptable, sometimes even fun). And I want it noted that while the "T and T" theme song is a trainwreck, the Nights theme song is excellent. Hasselhoff and Lou Rawls - what a combo.
Another parallel Nights shares with "T and T" is my general feeling that the people making it are constantly saying to themselves, "The ratings are bad so we need to shuffle things around." The first (minor) character is eliminated after just 4 episodes. Two new minor characters (one played by Donna D'Errico and one played by some dude) are introduced mid-way through the season. And those won't be the last cast changes but that will come later.
But another "shuffle" is the format of the show. In the earliest episodes, it's supposed to be a noir detective story, complete with Hasselhoff voiceovers like "My dad told me that once in a while you meet a woman so beautiful that it knocks the wind out of you. Maybe today was my turn..." But the noir narration is dropped fairly early on. There is also a big shift in its relation to "Baywatch." In the beginning, like I said, they avoid the topic completely, but then all of a sudden the mysteries (and therefore the episodes) will arise from the beach, lifeguards, etc. and sometimes they will dwell there. I got the feeling that someone saw low ratings and said "let's get some of that 'Baywatch' going" and quickly brought it front and center. And then suddenly they take the next step and there are actual characters from "Baywatch" crossing over to do a guest appearance!
Adding background actors to your scene can increase visual depth and interest.
And guest appearances, by the way, are one of the more delightful aspects of my experience with the show. I will list the major highlights:
S01E02 - J. Peterman from "Seinfeld" teams up with Kevin Arnold's older brother from "The Wonder Years" to steal money using rollerblades. That is real, that is what happens.
S01E06 - Robert Ginty! Also Nancy Cartwright (Bart Simpson).
S01E12 - "Stuttering John" Melendez - and actually acting, not playing himself.
S01E13 - Geraldo Rivera - also acting as a fictional character. His acting is better than I expected from Geraldo but there are a few moments where his performance is funny.
S01E16 - Yasmine Bleeth from the original "Baywatch."
S01E19 - Carmen Electra - before she was very well known, I think, and probably before she joined regular "Baywatch." But forget about her - Ben Murphy is in the ep and he's the evil villain of the week! Ben Murphy is always ruining everything.
Speaking of bad acting, do you want to see my favorite performance in all of Season 1? Here it is. #OscarWorthy. It's just the best. Why wasn't there a spin-off for this guy? I'd watch that.
I have to mention, though I don't know how to transition to it, the obvious selling point of the show. The ladies. The attractive woman aspect of the show (I have to assume) is much more toned down than "Baywatch" but it's still very prominent. In any given scene of exposition, the main characters will be talking on a bench with perfectly placed beach babes walking (or rollerblading) across the foreground and/or background. The background and the extras are much of the sex appeal of the show but then occasionally someone's in underwear or taking a shower or "out for a swim" or whatnot. I mean, human females do all of these things and the show needs to reflect reality. There is one episode where something went wrong and it just gets weird. S01E19, is suddenly racier than every episode before or since. For some reason they really seemed to be "going for something," trying to push the envelope on what they could get onto syndicated television.
So that's "Baywatch Nights" Season 1. It's silly, it's stupid, the premise/title makes NO sense; yes it's a bad show but not nearly as bad as it really could, or by rights should, be. It looks slick, it looks stylish, the characters are entirely likable, the writing is as good as it needs to be. It also has the added bonus of a great "of the 90s" nostalgia. It's usually just light and breezy, fairly harmless, casual entertainment. Obviously, I started regularly watching the episodes as an ironic stunt to create some blog posts but I have to admit that the show actually started to grow on me a little bit and so I have little content to speak of. It grew on me for two reasons. Firstly, because it's the time of year where the days are getting shorter and the temperatures are dropping - I found the bright, sunny California beach setting became infectious, almost therapeutic. And secondly, I realized at some point that Donna D'Errico's appearance in the opening credits was often the best part of my day. I'm not happy about it, I don't like to admit it, but this is what happened.
So that's everything I have to say about Season 1. But get ready because moving on to Season 2, EVERYTHING is about to change...
I really liked "The Munsters" when I was a kid. I liked it so much, I even watched the disastrous 80s reboot. But would you believe that up until a few days ago, I didn't even know there was a Munsters movie? In fact there are two.
"Munster, Go Home!" was made just a few years after the show was cancelled with almost all of the original cast. In it, Herman finds that a distant relative has died and he has inherited a large English estate and become a Lord. The Munsters go to England to be fish-out-of-water because, you know, they're not British. Other relatives who missed out of their inheritance conspire to get rid of the Munsters by scaring them off. Scare tactics obviously don't work, as the Munsters like that sort of thing. There is also a scheme to counterfeit money and the entire plot comes to a head at a hot rod race for reasons I didn't understand.
My first notable observation from this movie was the difference created by the absence of canned laughter. The TV show was the golden age of fake audience laughter, it was so intertwined in the fabric of the show you can't imagine The Munsters existing without it. And yet, in this movie, jokes and gags are followed by silence and it's almost disturbing, the stark contrast. I hate to say it, but the result made me think, "Is The Munsters actually not funny?"
One thing I did find funny that I really never registered when I was a kid was the running gag where Marilyn, the beautiful normal person in the family, is seen by the others as homely. Amongst the slapstick and gags, this is a nice, subtle, wry element.
The other thing I noticed, only now is the acting of the actress who plays Lily, Yvonne De Carlo. Even within a very "big" show like The Munsters, she is the most animated, the most exagerated. Everyone else is in a talkie, Yvonne is in a silent film... an extreme silent film. The thing is though, when I tried to find an example online to prove this assertion, I find all available clips are from the TV show and her acting suits the TV show perfectly. What makes the movie different? Well, if you ever watch "Munster, Go Home!" take a look.
At my lunch break I found a note that a package delivery had been attempted at my location and I needed to go to the USPS to pick it up. Ever ready to go to the post office (it is always a sweet experience) I got in my car and drove over.
As I'm walking on the sidewalk, I see an old woman in front of me. I catch up to her quickly, as she's walking very slowly, and I slow down right behind her. In this situation, I have the debate of what is the right thing to do. What I want to do is pass her, so that I can hold the door for her, but I wonder also whether passing someone who's walking slowly hurts their feelings. Not knowing what to do, I just slow down and stay behind. Then, in front of the door, she stops to put on a surgical mask. I wait behind her for a few seconds and then think, "this is stupid" and so I pass her and open/hold the door for her. In fact, I open and hold 3 doors for her, the design of the post office being what it is.
She says something like "That's nice of you to pass people" to which I smile, not knowing what that means or how to respond. It sounds like she might be angry that I passed her but then I was thinking it was possible that she's playfully thanking me for going ahead and opening the doors for her. Then I get in line to get my package and she says something to the same effect, I still smile and say something like "alright" still not understanding what she's saying. Then, as I'm walking up to the counter, she says, "I bet you wouldn't be smiling if it was you on the other side." And at that moment, I realized oh no, she's angry that I passed her. It was all a plot to get in front of her in line.
So it works as Seinfeld at both ends. From her perspective, she encountered a psychopath who's basically sprinting past old ladies to steal their place in line and then laughing at them when confronted. From my perspective, she stopped. If she was just a slow walker, I would have stayed behind no problem, in fact I did that, but she stopped... and when someone stops in front of you, you're under no obligation to sit and wait behind them. You stop, that's on you.
Before I get to my review, I want to inform you (or remind you if you already know) that you should not buy Red Delicious apples. Red Delicious apples are bred to be red irrespective of taste. That means that unsuspecting people buy them because they look good in the store only to find, when they get home, that they've been ripped off. Accordingly, applerankings has Red Delicious as 4th from the bottom with the description of "Coffee Grinds in a Leather Glove."
The lowest ranked apple on the list has a rating of 19 and described as "Long Island's Sand-Filled Condom," it's the Newtown Pippin Apple. I will try to get a hold of some of those if I can for a future post but I expect I won't be able. I've looked around and don't see a source anywhere.
So, the SweeTango Apple (with a rating of 93, "The Greatest of All-Time")... I was able to find some and it was pretty easy... and I've now tried them. I'll start with how applerankings is wrong first and then I'll explain why they're right.
Any time you see something described as "perfect" and the "greatest in the world" you build up certain expectations, or at least I do. I picture something in my head that's completely different, perhaps otherworldly or even supernatural. SweeTango apples are not that, they have not completely revolutionized my life. They are just apples. If you've ever enjoyed a good apple in your life, you pretty much have the idea of what SweeTango Apples are already in your mind.
But here's why the "perfect" description is apt. The skin, the texture, the sweetness, the taste, these are all so excellent and nothing in the experience is out of balance with anything else. I can't critique this apple, there is nothing to complain about. Even if it's not "out of this world," even if it's just an apple, still, this apple is excellent at being an apple.
So there you go. If you like apples and haven't already, check out SweeTango for sure. And if you don't care about apples and they don't excite you, just forget about it and keep going on with your life. And if that's the case, apologies for this long diversion into apples.
Yes, this month's snack nation is Spain. I don't have any pre-conceived notions about Spanish snacks other than that, perhaps, they'll be spicy.
Let's start with facts...
Restaurante Botin in Madrid is the oldest restaurant in the world. When it opened in 1725, you were expected to bring your own ingredients. The oven has supposedly been continuously burning for all that time.
You can tell how popular a bar is by the trash on the floor. It is a Spanish custom for customers to throw napkins, olive pits and other trash onto the floor.
The Spanish National Anthem has no lyrics.
There is a drink in Spanish called kalimotxo, it is red wine mixed with Coca-Cola.
At the restaurant El Diablo in Lanzarote, food is cooked via active volcano.
Let's go...
1. Acho - Fried Egg Flavored Potato Chips
Review:
Starting with a bang! In all the history of Month of Snacks, I don't know of any packaging/label that's filled me with as much excitement as this one. Fried Egg Potato Chips... Fried Egg. This is weird, this is crazy, this is not so off-the-wall that it can't possibly be good... it even has a shiny, picturesque white and yellow egg calling out from the front of the bag.
When you hear the term "Fried Egg Flavored Potato Chips," do you have trouble imagining what that would taste like? I'm trying to figure out if it's just me and I lack sufficient imagination. Because tasting these, they taste EXACTLY like fried egg flavored potato chips. Exactly. I even thought I should have bacon flavored chips to go along with them, as in a breakfast. I have no idea what to expect and then one bite and I think, "That's exactly what I should have expected."
I don't have the guts to unabashedly recommend them, they are weird and probably do require a "trying on a dare" mentality, but that being said, I think they're legitimately good and pretty fun.
2. Doble M
Translation: Honey and Butter Flavored Corn Puffs
Review:
It was just last month that I talked about my love for Korean Honey Butter Potato Chips, here we are with another Honey Butter snack. Is it fate?
These are the material and consistency of the regular Cheese Puffs you've had a million times. Except you substitute orange cheese flavor for popcorny flavor with some sweetness. I'll be honest, the flavor took a little time to get used to but overall I'd say pretty good. They really aren't too far off from Corn Pops or just regular popcorn, really. Not bad.
3. Conguitos - Peanut Cream
Review:
It's been a while since I had a candy bar.
This package has two "bars" - each is a string of slightly pyramidal chocolate pockets similar to a Caramello, but peanut butter instead of caramel. But not exactly peanut butter...
The inside is a crunchy nougat thing that represents peanut butter flavor. It's not miles away from a Butterfinger, for reference. Oh! It might be closer to a Twix, actually. And it's got the "two bars in one" thing in common too!
The Europeans mock the ubiquity of peanut butter in American snacks, it's interesting to find they have such a candy. I don't have any strong opinion on this either way. It's good but there's nothing exotic about it, you don't need to go to Spain to eat a Twix.
4. Vidal - Gummi Sour Kiwi
Review:
Here in the U.S. we have sour patch kids and "ultra-sour" candy and all that. And so these seem very American, very much in the vein of what you might expect. Very kiwi-ey, very sour, very sugary.
Don't have much to say... Pretty good.
5. Lacasitas Gold
Review:
These look a lot like M&Ms, etc. The look like this:
So, it's pretty interesting that the shell has a slight Orange Tic Tac flavor to me. That was unexpected. The packaging says "White Chocolate Candy with Caramel Flavor" and I wouldn't dispute that too much but, to me, I'm getting a Butter Rum flavor from it. Perhaps that's because Butter Rum is made up of white chocolate and caramel? Eh, no, though I can't get solid information. Butter Rum seems to only exist as a flavor for Lifesavers and based on the name, I assume derives from Buttered Rum, a Christmas drink with rum (obviously). But there is also Rum Butter which is an English Christmas spread. Rum Butter, for what it's worth, is made with rum, brown sugar and cinnamon.
Going further, it started to taste more like chocolate. Perhaps it's the Orange Tic Tac mixed with chocolate becomes Butter Rum. This whole entry is just a huge mistake. Unmitigated Disaster.
Final verdict... If you haven't had Reese's Pieces lately, I'd recommend those first - Reese's Pieces are magical - but these are a good second place and I'd recommend them.
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The previous "Most Like America" post was Israel but Spain has now overtaken them for first. These are very similar to the kinds of things that are released and become successful here. I'm very surprised. Keep in mind, I don't think it's a bad thing, just bad for the "adventure" aspect of the blog.
Overall, very strong showing, there wasn't a single negative food. Somewhat anti-climatic due to the best item being the first but... And I'm going to latch on to that one, the most exotic entry, the egg chips, and offer them to people I know to see how they react.
