10 MPH - Telling Scary Stories and Taking Vitals

 

I Watched Every Episode of Baywatch Nights - Season 2

 

One of my speculations during Season 1 of "Baywatch Nights" was that it was constantly being tweaked due to low ratings. Well, in between Seasons 1 and 2, producers decided tweaking, re-tooling and adjusting just wasn't good enough - forget all that - instead, for Season 2, they pushed the Whopper Button.

From Wikipedia:

"For the second season, facing slipping ratings, which were never as good as the original series, the producers decided to switch to a science-fiction format (inspired by the success of The X-Files)."

Ho boy! Yes, the silly, beach-adjacent detective show with attractive women walking around in the background has changed to a paranormal investigation show set in a darkly lit sound stage. A pretty dramatic switch, I'd say, but do you think they're going to explain it within the logic of the show? Not one bit.

As the season begins, one of the main characters of the show (played by Gregallen Williams) is gone. Did he quit? Did he die? Did he retire? Not a word is spent on him, his name will not even be said. Whereas in the first season, each episode would begin with a customer wanting to hire the detective agency, now episodes begin with a mysterious government agent, Diamont Teague, needing their help for secret government secrets. Why? They were never paranormal experts, they were just an average detective agency, when did they become experts in the paranormal and why does the government, the richest organization in the world, ask THEM for help? We're talking about a former lifeguard and his pals, here. Never discussed, don't worry about it.

Maybe the show is better off not explaining. Because the one time they do make an attempt, the result is hilarious. In S02E07, a woman calls them because she's worried her daughter is in too deep with voodoo. Why does she call them? They explain: because Mitch, as a lifeguard, once saved her daughter. That's what they say. When you're battling a Haitian cult, you call Mitch Buchanan the former lifeguard because....? He swims good and can administer CPR? He'll bring a whistle or even a red floaty thing?

Regardless of the inciting incident, you can imagine the formula: each week is another phenomenon - creature from the black lagoon, aliens, ghosts, mummies, werewolves, time vortexes; they investigate them all, come to a conclusion and give a happy ending that's tinged with some ambiguity or spookiness.

One of the tropes they follow to a painful degree is: two partners on an investigation and one is a skeptic and the other is a believer (or more open to the possibility). Mitch and his partner trade off these roles depending on the episode but most of the time Mitch is the skeptic. It's a tried-and-true formula but it doesn't work so good when you're doing a TV series. "Don't give me those silly wives' tales" is a really weird thing to say when something paranormal has specifically happened to you every single week for the past 17 weeks and you've seen concrete evidence that it's all real. This stupidity reaches unbelievable levels in the episode (again S02E07) where Mitch, the victim of voodoo, is driving in a car alone and finds his hands spontaneously start bleeding, then feels stabs in his side and can barely move, then sees a man's stomach spontaneously explode, finds his hand has spontaneously healed but at the end of the episode he's SURE that voodoo doesn't exist. Mitch, you're a cartoon. It is possible that his denial is said as a joke, but given the tenor of the rest of the season, I don't think so.

Here's my favorite action sequence of the show. I can't decide if that's what they meant to do or somebody screwed up badly. Well someone screwed up badly either way but I mean, is that "style"? What is that? Is it exciting when a fight scene is blurry, hard to follow and shot at 3 frames per second?

Let's talk best and worst episodes. The best episode, I think, is S02E06, the gang goes into an old cabin and gets trapped in a surreal time-portal/time-loop thing. This is one of the more creative plots and the most dreamlike and they mix the sci-fi with some humor. It's still not great but it has, at least, something to it - it's enjoyable, it's different, you can see the kernel of a good show somewhere in there. Also in the "imaginative" category is S02E13, the gang investigates a Virtual Reality D&D computer game that swallows people into another dimension. It's very dumb but full marks for "going for it" with an odd idea, as opposed to just fighting a mummy or a vampire. The worst episode is very tough because the entire series is a slog, but the dumbest episode, I'll say, is S02E12 where a Viking is found in ice, unfrozen by scientists and goes on a rampage in modern day Los Angeles. A Viking, complete with the horn helmet, swinging his sword at trucks... it's so laughable.

Serious Science-Fiction, ya'll.

Let's run through guest stars again. It was more fun the last time but we need to get through it.

• S02E05 - Brant von Hoffman - not a celebrity but I just want to point out that he played two different characters across the two different seasons of "Baywatch Nights." Shyah! Right! As if we wouldn't notice!
• S02E11 - Robert Ginty! Again! He was also in Season 1 as another character.
• S02E12 - Edward Mulhare! He was Michael Knight's boss in "Knight Rider" (which obviously also starred David Hasselhoff) so this is an unofficial reunion episode. This episode also has Tom Dreesen and Johnny Dark. They're both good friends of "Late Show with David Letterman" and they happen to be in the same episode acting along one another in the same scene. Seems like a big coincidence, maybe there's a story there, I don't know.
• S02E16 - Pamela Bach-Hasselhoff. I remember her from "Baywatch" because I had a crush on her. I never knew her name so I never knew that she was actually married to David Hasselhoff in real life.
• S02E18 - Terry Kiser! From "Weekend at Bernies." He's Bernie.
• S02E19 - Alexandra Paul - Stephanie from "Baywatch." She died in "Baywatch" the previous year and appears here as a ghost.
• S02E20 - Rance Howard - father of Ron and Clint.
• S02E22 - Gregallen Williams - the guy who was a major character last season but cut from this one returns to do a cameo in one episode. No, they don't bother to explain anything, he just shows up and he's there now.

A few other unrelated notes. 

• Due to particular structure of S02E13, 21 minutes into a 42 minute episode and the opening credits are still playing. 
• In S02E01, Mitch is reading a real (I think) newspaper that contains the headline "Flyers Will Drink from Stanley Cup." The episode aired September 1996, which means it was filmed before that, and so the headline probably refers to the 1995-1996 playoffs. The Flyers finished first in their conference that year but lost in the second round to the Florida Panthers. In fact, the Flyers have not drunk from the Stanley Cup since then and we're coming up on 30 years later.
• There is a two episode run (S02E20-21) where Mitch and Angie Harmon's character are especially affectionate and playful with each other. Their chemistry has completely changed and it's very cute. I thought a show centered around these characters - a different show - could have really been enjoyable.
• I mentioned the theme song for Season 1 was excellent, the theme for Season 2 is not.

So that's "Baywatch Nights" Season 2. It's not exactly a terrible show but it's incredibly boring and was a complete slog for me. The acting and production are well done but I just don't care at all. When the  first season was stupid and silly, it could fall back on a certain amount of charm and attractive women. This season is stupid and silly but intends to be dark and serious sci-fi/horror and it's all very offputting. Keep in mind, I hate horror so I do have that bias but I like science-fiction. Good science fiction usually has a certain weight of intellect behind it, though, and the word "intellect" is one thing that has never been associated with Mitch Buchanan and "Baywatch". 

Even if the title didn't doom the project from the start, I think the entire concept of aping "X-Files" was doomed for failure. Yes, "The X-Files" was a big hit but that doesn't mean there was a sudden upswell in the public's demand for paranormal investigation shows. Bear in mind, I know almost nothing about "The X-Files" so I could be wrong here, but I don't think people's attraction to it was due to a love of aliens and monsters. I think the idea that "The Truth is out there" struck a chord with the zeitgeist of the time, it tapped into an unexpressed, deep-seated feeling that we were all being lied to. Compare that to the Nights tagline "The nights will never be the same" and you can see why it never made it to a Season 3.

And now that "Baywatch Nights" has inexplicably intersected with the genre of ghosts and goblins, you can see this whole venture into "Baywatch Nights" was in celebration of Halloween. Did you see that one coming? Happy Halloween.

The Munster's Revenge (1981)

 

There is not one, but TWO Munsters movies.

As the movie begins, the Munsters are visiting a wax museum and admiring their own statues. Immediately we're presented with two mysteries. First off, why do they have wax statues in a museum? In the Munsters Universe, they are not famous, as far as I remember. The movie doesn't explain. Secondly, their little boy Eddie who was about 12 in 1966, is still 12 in 1981. I don't get it, are they the same people? Are they not aging? Time travel? The 1966 movie created controversy by replacing the actress who Marilyn in the show and now both Marilyn and Eddie are both different.

So anyways, these wax figures exist but it turns out they're not just wax figures, they're actually robits. The owner of the museum (played by Sid Caesar, who the kids know from nothing) is using science to make the robots go out and commit crime. When witnesses describe the assailants, the police go after the Munsters. Now the family has to prove that they're innocent by convincing the police that it wasn't them, it was evil robot Munsterses.

I don't know the extent, but the premise sounds somewhat similar to "Kiss Meets the Phantom of the Park" which came out in 1978.

The difference between this movie and the last Munsters movie is immediately obvious. Though the canned laughter is still missing, the absence isn't noticeable. This movie has better jokes, more jokes, funnier situations and snappier dialogue. It is still dumb, make no mistake, but it's dumb in the best way possible - it's The Munsters, what do you expect? If you see only one Munsters movie this holiday season, make sure it's "The Munster's Revenge!"

And special recognition to Fred Gwynne's performance as Herman Munster and the character in general. Watching the hulking mass act with naivety and gentleness is a pleasure to watch. He is the quintessential gentle giant. Gwynne was such an enjoyable, talented actor; it was unfortunate that he was typecast, though it's understandable in the sense that he was so good in this role. Either way, I'm glad "My Cousin Vinny" was as big a hit as it was, at least we got that.

I Watched Every Episode of Baywatch Nights - Season 1

"Baywatch Nights" is a laughingstock, a joke, the prototypical bad spin-off cash-in. If you are crafting a joke and need an embarrassing show that, nevertheless, people will recognize, I can think of no better punchline than "Baywatch Nights." That's why I watched every (available) episode. But what I found when I watched it surprised me in a number of ways...

Here's the first surprise: the first season is not really that bad. I really wanted the worst show out there and had to constantly admit that it just... isn't... terrible. Yes, on the one hand, it's not good enough to be a good show and I don't claim that it is good, but the sad fact is it's not bad enough to really be hilarious either.

"Baywatch Nights" follows Mitch Buchanan (David Hasselhoff) and his partners (played by Gregallen Williams and Angie Harmon) in their detective agency business. The formula for the show is obvious: every week someone comes in with a case/mystery and every week they catch the bad guys. In the early episodes, nothing is explained. Typically the first episode would be everyone meeting each other, explaining the backstory. The show has no backstory and particularly doesn't bother to explain how this is "Baywatch" aside from the existence of the character Mitch Buchanan. Presumably Mitch isn't a lifeguard by day and a detective by night because we see him doing detective work at night, but nor are we told that he's retired from lifeguarding. The show simply starts without explaining anything.

Throughout the show there's a "will-they-won't-they" between Mitch and Angie Harmon's character which is just as unexplained. Usually, when you put two characters together and show an obvious attraction between them, you also set up an obstacle that keeps them apart. This show sets up the obvious attraction between their characters, has them flirt, has them never becoming involved but gives no reason as to why. It isn't until the 8th episode where they "recall" that they had agreed some time in the past (not depicted) to not mix business with pleasure. Ok fine, you did the bare minimum, congrats, but that's still 7 episodes of "huh? why?"

There are a lot of parallels with "T and T." I get the feeling that this is the show that "T and T" would like to be - they both went for style, they're both detective shows revolving around solving a mystery, they're both cheesy but they both take themselves seriously. But whereas "T and T" had a general serious/downer tone, Nights is fun and generally lighthearted. Whereas "T and T" is the bad watching-tv-on-summer-vacation show, Nights is the acceptable watching-tv-on-summer-vacation show (acceptable, sometimes even fun). And I want it noted that while the "T and T" theme song is a trainwreck, the Nights theme song is excellent. Hasselhoff and Lou Rawls - what a combo.

Another parallel Nights shares with "T and T" is my general feeling that the people making it are constantly saying to themselves, "The ratings are bad so we need to shuffle things around." The first (minor) character is eliminated after just 4 episodes. Two new minor characters (one played by Donna D'Errico and one played by some dude) are introduced mid-way through the season. And those won't be the last cast changes but that will come later.

But another "shuffle" is the format of the show. In the earliest episodes, it's supposed to be a noir detective story, complete with Hasselhoff voiceovers like "My dad told me that once in a while you meet a woman so beautiful that it knocks the wind out of you. Maybe today was my turn..." But the noir narration is dropped fairly early on. There is also a big shift in its relation to "Baywatch." In the beginning, like I said, they avoid the topic completely, but then all of a sudden the mysteries (and therefore the episodes) will arise from the beach, lifeguards, etc. and sometimes they will dwell there. I got the feeling that someone saw low ratings and said "let's get some of that 'Baywatch' going" and quickly brought it front and center. And then suddenly they take the next step and there are actual characters from "Baywatch" crossing over to do a guest appearance!

Adding background actors to your scene can increase visual depth and interest.

And guest appearances, by the way, are one of the more delightful aspects of my experience with the show. I will list the major highlights:

•  S01E02 - J. Peterman from "Seinfeld" teams up with Kevin Arnold's older brother from "The Wonder Years" to steal money using rollerblades. That is real, that is what happens.
• S01E06 - Robert Ginty! Also Nancy Cartwright (Bart Simpson).
• S01E12 - "Stuttering John" Melendez - and actually acting, not playing himself.
• S01E13 - Geraldo Rivera - also acting as a fictional character. His acting is better than I expected from Geraldo but there are a few moments where his performance is funny.
• S01E16 - Yasmine Bleeth from the original "Baywatch."
• S01E19 - Carmen Electra - before she was very well known, I think, and probably before she joined regular "Baywatch." But forget about her - Ben Murphy is in the ep and he's the evil villain of the week! Ben Murphy is always ruining everything.

Speaking of bad acting, do you want to see my favorite performance in all of Season 1? Here it is. #OscarWorthy. It's just the best. Why wasn't there a spin-off for this guy? I'd watch that.

I have to mention, though I don't know how to transition to it, the obvious selling point of the show. The ladies. The attractive woman aspect of the show (I have to assume) is much more toned down than "Baywatch" but it's still very prominent. In any given scene of exposition, the main characters will be talking on a bench with perfectly placed beach babes walking (or rollerblading) across the foreground and/or background. The background and the extras are much of the sex appeal of the show but then occasionally someone's in underwear or taking a shower or "out for a swim" or whatnot. I mean, human females do all of these things and the show needs to reflect reality. There is one episode where something went wrong and it just gets weird. S01E19, is suddenly racier than every episode before or since. For some reason they really seemed to be "going for something," trying to push the envelope on what they could get onto syndicated television.

So that's "Baywatch Nights" Season 1. It's silly, it's stupid, the premise/title makes NO sense; yes it's a bad show but not nearly as bad as it really could, or by rights should, be. It looks slick, it looks stylish, the characters are entirely likable, the writing is as good as it needs to be. It also has the added bonus of a great "of the 90s" nostalgia. It's usually just light and breezy, fairly harmless, casual entertainment. Obviously, I started regularly watching the episodes as an ironic stunt to create some blog posts but I have to admit that the show actually started to grow on me a little bit and so I have little content to speak of. It grew on me for two reasons. Firstly, because it's the time of year where the days are getting shorter and the temperatures are dropping - I found the bright, sunny California beach setting became infectious, almost therapeutic. And secondly, I realized at some point that Donna D'Errico's appearance in the opening credits was often the best part of my day. I'm not happy about it, I don't like to admit it, but this is what happened.

So that's everything I have to say about Season 1. But get ready because moving on to Season 2, EVERYTHING is about to change...

Munster, Go Home! (1966)

 

I really liked "The Munsters" when I was a kid. I liked it so much, I even watched the disastrous 80s reboot. But would you believe that up until a few days ago, I didn't even know there was a Munsters movie? In fact there are two.

"Munster, Go Home!" was made just a few years after the show was cancelled with almost all of the original cast. In it, Herman finds that a distant relative has died and he has inherited a large English estate and become a Lord. The Munsters go to England to be fish-out-of-water because, you know, they're not British. Other relatives who missed out of their inheritance conspire to get rid of the Munsters by scaring them off. Scare tactics obviously don't work, as the Munsters like that sort of thing. There is also a scheme to counterfeit money and the entire plot comes to a head at a hot rod race for reasons I didn't understand.

My first notable observation from this movie was the difference created by the absence of canned laughter. The TV show was the golden age of fake audience laughter, it was so intertwined in the fabric of the show you can't imagine The Munsters existing without it. And yet, in this movie, jokes and gags are followed by silence and it's almost disturbing, the stark contrast. I hate to say it, but the result made me think, "Is The Munsters actually not funny?"

One thing I did find funny that I really never registered when I was a kid was the running gag where Marilyn, the beautiful normal person in the family, is seen by the others as homely. Amongst the slapstick and gags, this is a nice, subtle, wry element.

The other thing I noticed, only now is the acting of the actress who plays Lily, Yvonne De Carlo. Even within a very "big" show like The Munsters, she is the most animated, the most exagerated. Everyone else is in a talkie, Yvonne is in a silent film... an extreme silent film. The thing is though, when I tried to find an example online to prove this assertion, I find all available clips are from the TV show and her acting suits the TV show perfectly. What makes the movie different? Well, if you ever watch "Munster, Go Home!" take a look.

Real Life Seinfeld - The Post Office

 At my lunch break I found a note that a package delivery had been attempted at my location and I needed to go to the USPS to pick it up. Ever ready to go to the post office (it is always a sweet experience) I got in my car and drove over.

As I'm walking on the sidewalk, I see an old woman in front of me. I catch up to her quickly, as she's walking very slowly, and I slow down right behind her. In this situation, I have the debate of what is the right thing to do. What I want to do is pass her, so that I can hold the door for her, but I wonder also whether passing someone who's walking slowly hurts their feelings. Not knowing what to do, I just slow down and stay behind. Then, in front of the door, she stops to put on a surgical mask. I wait behind her for a few seconds and then think, "this is stupid" and so I pass her and open/hold the door for her. In fact, I open and hold 3 doors for her, the design of the post office being what it is.

She says something like "That's nice of you to pass people" to which I smile, not knowing what that means or how to respond. It sounds like she might be angry that I passed her but then I was thinking it was possible that she's playfully thanking me for going ahead and opening the doors for her. Then I get in line to get my package and she says something to the same effect, I still smile and say something like "alright" still not understanding what she's saying. Then, as I'm walking up to the counter, she says, "I bet you wouldn't be smiling if it was you on the other side." And at that moment, I realized oh no, she's angry that I passed her. It was all a plot to get in front of her in line.

So it works as Seinfeld at both ends. From her perspective, she encountered a psychopath who's basically sprinting past old ladies to steal their place in line and then laughing at them when confronted. From my perspective, she stopped. If she was just a slow walker, I would have stayed behind no problem, in fact I did that, but she stopped... and when someone stops in front of you, you're under no obligation to sit and wait behind them. You stop, that's on you.

The SweeTango Apple - A Review

 Recently, during my review of the Cosmic Crisp Apple, I found that there is actually a website dedicated to ranking apples. Shortly after that, I found that the SweeTango apple is ranked #1 in the world. And so here we are.

Before I get to my review, I want to inform you (or remind you if you already know) that you should not buy Red Delicious apples. Red Delicious apples are bred to be red irrespective of taste. That means that unsuspecting people buy them because they look good in the store only to find, when they get home, that they've been ripped off.  Accordingly, applerankings has Red Delicious as 4th from the bottom with the description of "Coffee Grinds in a Leather Glove."

The lowest ranked apple on the list has a rating of 19 and described as "Long Island's Sand-Filled Condom," it's the Newtown Pippin Apple. I will try to get a hold of some of those if I can for a future post but I expect I won't be able. I've looked around and don't see a source anywhere.

So, the SweeTango Apple (with a rating of 93, "The Greatest of All-Time")... I was able to find some and it was pretty easy... and I've now tried them. I'll start with how applerankings is wrong first and then I'll explain why they're right.

Any time you see something described as "perfect" and the "greatest in the world" you build up certain expectations, or at least I do. I picture something in my head that's completely different, perhaps otherworldly or even supernatural. SweeTango apples are not that, they have not completely revolutionized my life. They are just apples. If you've ever enjoyed a good apple in your life, you pretty much have the idea of what SweeTango Apples are already in your mind.

But here's why the "perfect" description is apt. The skin, the texture, the sweetness, the taste, these are all so excellent and nothing in the experience is out of balance with anything else. I can't critique this apple, there is nothing to complain about. Even if it's not "out of this world," even if it's just an apple, still, this apple is excellent at being an apple.

So there you go. If you like apples and haven't already, check out SweeTango for sure. And if you don't care about apples and they don't excite you, just forget about it and keep going on with your life. And if that's the case, apologies for this long diversion into apples.

Month #11 - Spain Snacks

 Yes, this month's snack nation is Spain. I don't have any pre-conceived notions about Spanish snacks other than that, perhaps, they'll be spicy.

Let's start with facts...

• Restaurante Botin in Madrid is the oldest restaurant in the world. When it opened in 1725, you were expected to bring your own ingredients. The oven has supposedly been continuously burning for all that time.
• You can tell how popular a bar is by the trash on the floor. It is a Spanish custom for customers to throw napkins, olive pits and other trash onto the floor.
• The Spanish National Anthem has no lyrics.
• There is a drink in Spanish called kalimotxo, it is red wine mixed with Coca-Cola.
• At the restaurant El Diablo in Lanzarote, food is cooked via active volcano.

Let's go...

1. Acho - Fried Egg Flavored Potato Chips

Review:

Starting with a bang! In all the history of Month of Snacks, I don't know of any packaging/label that's filled me with as much excitement as this one. Fried Egg Potato Chips... Fried Egg. This is weird, this is crazy, this is not so off-the-wall that it can't possibly be good... it even has a shiny, picturesque white and yellow egg calling out from the front of the bag. 

When you hear the term "Fried Egg Flavored Potato Chips," do you have trouble imagining what that would taste like? I'm trying to figure out if it's just me and I lack sufficient imagination. Because tasting these, they taste EXACTLY like fried egg flavored potato chips. Exactly. I even thought I should have bacon flavored chips to go along with them, as in a breakfast. I have no idea what to expect and then one bite and I think, "That's exactly what I should have expected."

I don't have the guts to unabashedly recommend them, they are weird and probably do require a "trying on a dare" mentality, but that being said, I think they're legitimately good and pretty fun.

2. Doble M 

Translation: Honey and Butter Flavored Corn Puffs

Review: 

It was just last month that I talked about my love for Korean Honey Butter Potato Chips, here we are with another Honey Butter snack. Is it fate?

These are the material and consistency of the regular Cheese Puffs you've had a million times. Except you substitute orange cheese flavor for popcorny flavor with some sweetness. I'll be honest, the flavor took a little time to get used to but overall I'd say pretty good. They really aren't too far off from Corn Pops or just regular popcorn, really. Not bad.

3. Conguitos - Peanut Cream

Review:

It's been a while since I had a candy bar.

This package has two "bars" - each is a string of slightly pyramidal chocolate pockets similar to a Caramello, but peanut butter instead of caramel. But not exactly peanut butter...

The inside is a crunchy nougat thing that represents peanut butter flavor. It's not miles away from a Butterfinger, for reference. Oh! It might be closer to a Twix, actually. And it's got the "two bars in one" thing in common too! 

The Europeans mock the ubiquity of peanut butter in American snacks, it's interesting to find they have such a candy. I don't have any strong opinion on this either way. It's good but there's nothing exotic about it, you don't need to go to Spain to eat a Twix.

4. Vidal - Gummi Sour Kiwi

Review:

Here in the U.S. we have sour patch kids and "ultra-sour" candy and all that. And so these seem very American, very much in the vein of what you might expect. Very kiwi-ey, very sour, very sugary. 

Don't have much to say... Pretty good.

5. Lacasitas Gold

Review:

These look a lot like M&Ms, etc. The look like this:

So, it's pretty interesting that the shell has a slight Orange Tic Tac flavor to me. That was unexpected. The packaging says "White Chocolate Candy with Caramel Flavor" and I wouldn't dispute that too much but, to me, I'm getting a Butter Rum flavor from it. Perhaps that's because Butter Rum is made up of white chocolate and caramel? Eh, no, though I can't get solid information. Butter Rum seems to only exist as a flavor for Lifesavers and based on the name, I assume derives from Buttered Rum, a Christmas drink with rum (obviously). But there is also Rum Butter which is an English Christmas spread. Rum Butter, for what it's worth, is made with rum, brown sugar and cinnamon.

Going further, it started to taste more like chocolate. Perhaps it's the Orange Tic Tac mixed with chocolate becomes Butter Rum. This whole entry is just a huge mistake. Unmitigated Disaster.

Final verdict... If you haven't had Reese's Pieces lately, I'd recommend those first - Reese's Pieces are magical - but these are a good second place and I'd recommend them.

---

The previous "Most Like America" post was Israel but Spain has now overtaken them for first. These are very similar to the kinds of things that are released and become successful here. I'm very surprised. Keep in mind, I don't think it's a bad thing, just bad for the "adventure" aspect of the blog.

Overall, very strong showing, there wasn't a single negative food. Somewhat anti-climatic due to the best item being the first but... And I'm going to latch on to that one, the most exotic entry, the egg chips, and offer them to people I know to see how they react.

See you next month for the last month.

Random Frankenstein Thoughts

 Today I was wondering why Frankenstein's (Frankenstein's monster's) head was flat. I don't remember it from the novel and it seems like such a random thing. Where did it come from? Who decided and why?

Well it originates in the movie "Frankenstein" (1931) but specifically un-credited make-up artist Jack Pierce. Says Pierce:

“I discovered there are six ways a surgeon can cut the skull, and I figured Dr. Frankenstein, who was not a practicing surgeon, would take the easiest. That is, he would cut the top of the skull straight across like a pot lid, hinge it, pop the brain in, and clamp it tight. That’s the reason I decided to made the Monster’s head square and flat like a box.”

And I'm so impressed by that. I just don't imagine make-up artists putting that much thought into their craft. They likely don't anymore.

Ok but why is he green? That's apparently still due to Pierce but the explanation is more complex. According to this article, his skin is described as yellow in the book. But Pierce made him green because:

The color sensitivity of the film stock used in the 1930s meant that certain shades of green would show up on screen as a ghostly white. Karloff’s green makeup, then, both tinted the actor’s skin to a cadaverous pallor and gave him a decidedly different complexion than the rest of the cast.

But, of course, the movie is in black and white so why would that matter? Well, when it was time to make color promotional materials, artists used Boris Karloff in his full makeup as reference and so he was depicted to the public as green. And the rest is history.

Another quick Frankenstein-adjacent fun fact... Fred Gwynne, in making his Herman Munster character, based Herman's physical mannerisms on his mother. And it amazes me how I never noticed before, but if you look at him again, it just jumps out at you how feminine his physicality is. Not just feminine but maternal. In retrospect it completely makes sense.

Late Night - James Downey's Favorite Moments (Part 2)

 

See Part 1 here.

10 MPH - Candies From Around the World

 

At one point I was feeling pretty good, thinking I had already tried most of these. But then it keeps going and going and my percentage kept dropping.

Sure, I may be accused of taking it too seriously, but I really want it clearly stated what they're tasting so I can try them myself. The purposely sloppy nature of 10 MPH strikes again.

Duaffy M&S - Rocky IV

 I said no one else had gotten to "Rocky IV," well now they have...

Did we really have robits in the 80s?

There's a running motif(?) throughout "Rocky IV" that I never noticed before. "Rocky IV" is about our ability to change.

When Rocky is trying to convince Apollo not to fight Drago:

Rocky: Let's face it, we got to change sometime.

Apollo: I don't want to change! I like who I am!

and then "You and me, we don't have a choice"

Later, Adrian tries to convince Rocky not to fight:

Adrian: Why can't you change your thinking, everybody else does.

Rocky: Because I'm a fighter [...] we can't change what we are.

Adrian: Yes, you can.

Rocky: Can't change anything, Adrian. All we can do is go with what we are.

And then after the fight, Rocky gives his speech:

"During this fight, I seen a lot of changin' - the way youse felt about me and the way I felt about you. [...] If I can change... and you can change... everybody can change!"

[And when it's time to change, you've got to rearrange.]

This running theme underscores the movie as a allegory for the Cold War itself. Rocky is told that fighting Drago means certain suicide, why is he willing to risk "everything"? But he continues on the path toward the fight, believing that there was no alternative. But the US and Soviet Union don't have to stubbornly march toward mutually assured destruction - it isn't destined, we can choose not to fight, we have a choice.

Late Show Writer's Favorite Moments

 Late Show writer Rodney Rothman recalls his favorite moments on the Late Show:

The thumbnail tells the story.

This video comes with a regret. I absolutely regret not remembering all the fake bands/musical guests. As a religious viewer, I know I saw most of them but I only remember Fresh Step. I have a theory as to why. I don't think there's any way I would determine a bad musical from a real musical. Even the real ones feel like parodies to me. I mean, look at the clips, would you do any better? I also don't remember Fresh Step being on more than once.

And Now My Fresh Step Story...

I'm watching the Late Show and their musical guest is a boy band "Fresh Step." I'm horrified but boy bands were not a new thing on the Late Show so "it is what it is." When the performance is over it's the time when Dave goes over and shakes hands with the guests and says "that was great," "thanks for coming," etc. Except he doesn't, he stays at his desk. At his desk he says "Fresh Step, everyone" or something and it goes to commercial. Dave ALWAYS walks over to greet the guest - always. Sometimes it gets edited out for time but that's what happens every time.

As the kind of viewer that obsessed over every detail of the Late Show, I sensed something was wrong behind the scenes. Dave stayed far away from them like they were the plague. I thought it was pretty obvious he must have hated them. One theory I came up with was that he didn't want to have them on at all but got overruled and was mad about it. 

I always remembered that moment as one of the interesting behind-the-scenes mysteries until many years later I found out the band was fake and... well, I can't explain why Dave wouldn't shake their hands to sell the bit completely... but at least he wasn't being rude and there wasn't some power struggle.

RIP - Don Beveridge (1932-2022)

 

RIP to Don Beveridge who has passed away at the age of 90.

A week before his death, Don commented about his long life saying, "It was quite a ride."[...]

Don was drafted into the U.S. Army, serving in Korea as a Staff Sergeant during the Korean War. This is where he said he learned how to lead people...

As his Mobil responsibilities grew, so did his family. He and Betty raised a family of six children, Donna, Don, Diane, Dirk, Debbie, and Dawn. It has been a family joke that he named all of his kids after his wife, Betty...

While attending an Executive Education program at The University of Wisconsin, Madison, he was underwhelmed. He approached the program director and said, "I could do better than that." He was told to "Prove it."... And prove it he did...

Over the last years of his life, Don struggled with Parkinson's Disease and was lovingly and tirelessly cared for by his wife Betty with loving support from his long-term care giver, Grace Realbuto...

Don would appreciate donations to the Wounded Warrior Project instead of flowers.

The Cosmic Crisp Apple - A Review

It's been almost 3 years since I saw this video...

And since then I've been on a quest to find one. It seemed futile given the "It's only available from Washington" nature but, who knows, maybe apple smugglers would create an apple black market at some point.

Well, yesterday I noticed a market near me was offering Cosmic Crisp Apples so I made the trip and was successful.

My review? Having had one, I can definitely say it tastes like an apple. If you're looking for a weird food adventure, this isn't it. It's 99% apple flavor with 1% extra sweetness - the news stories that say extra sugar content are accurate here. But if you've ever had apple cider, you can imagine how these taste. But the scientists that created it were breeding towards longer shelf life rather than flavor so expecting anything different was my mistake. On that subject, the above video makes reference to people claiming Cosmic Crisps could last a year, but I find no websites claiming that now and I have no interest in testing it myself.

So if I was going for flavor, what should I be hunting for? Well, according to applerankings.com, the SweeTango Apple is the greatest of all-time. Dang it, they were available at the store I was just at and I passed right by. Well, I'll look for those sometime. Deciding to review an apple was kind of a joke, now I see apple reviewing is serious business and people are going to come to my blog and be disappointed.

A Long String of Copyright Claims

 In case anyone is curious about what's happening behind the scenes, it appears Letterman is revving up his youtube channel. How do I know? My email inbox is a long string of copyright claims for Late Show clips. It's more than one per day at this point.

As I've said before, I wouldn't mind this (it's their stuff, after all) IF they were uploading the same clips and wanted to eliminate the bootlegs. But so far they've been taking down stuff that they haven't bothered to upload on their own channel. The end result is the viewers get screwed.

So that's that.

Lost Version of Planes, Trains and Automobiles to be Released

 Almost 2 years ago, I shared that there is a 'Lost' version of "Plains, Trains and Automobiles."

That footage has now been found and will be released on Blu-Ray later this year. According to TheHDRoom, the set will include:

Over and hour’s worth of newly discovered never-before-seen deleted and extended scenes from the archives of John Hughes are being packaged on an additional Blu-ray in this set. The 4K disc will house some legacy extras noted below.

• Getting There is Half the Fun: The Story of Planes, Trains and Automobiles
• John Hughes: Life Moves Pretty Fast (2-Part Documentary):
• John Hughes: The Voice of a Generation
• Heartbreak and Triumph: The Legacy of John Hughes
• John Hughes for Adults
• A Tribute to John Candy