If you're not familiar with James Downey, you probably are but just don't know it. In addition to being head writer for Late Night, he's been a long time writer for SNL, particularly Norm Macdonalds' "Weekend Update." He was also the star of "Grayson Moorhead" on SNL, he's the best part of "Billy Madison" and the best part of "Dirty Work."
After I watched one restoration video, my stream was flooded with a million more suggestions just like it. This alone is not surprising. But what I noticed was that of the myriad other suggestions, no two were from the same channel. That was a shock.
And you can tell that someone, somewhere, at some point in the past cracked the code because they're all following the same formula. Firstly, no talking. At no point in the video should you hear a human voice. If something needs to be communicated, it must be by text or gesture. Secondly, no humans (other than hands and arms). Secondly, no music, even for montages. The only sounds we hear are, first and foremost, the sound of the parts and tools and then secondly, occasionally, the ambient environment.
The effect is obvious. This is ASMR, this is the tranquility of Bob Ross meets the power tools of Norm Abram, this is oddly satisfying. This is that genre of videos that I don't know the name of which are pleasurable because they go from disorder to order. If you know the term for that, let me know.
One of the ways you can divide children (or people) is between those who are more interested in people and those who are more interested in things. Those who are more interested in people become nurses, teachers, social workers, etc. The people interested in things become engineers, inventors, mechanics. It's clear these videos appeal to the thing people in the extreme.
The most magical part of these videos is the sandblasting. You take the cruddiest, most decayed rusted metal and you think it's only fit for the trash and then you wave the sandblaster over it and it's like new - exactly like a magic wand. It's oddly satisfying, it's hypnotic. The second best part is the compliment to the sandblasting - powder coating (painting) the new, bright, shiny color.
The genre goes is a few directions. Most I've seen are old toys like the video above but there are also plastic toys from the 80s and 90s, electronics restorations (playstation, nintendo, etc) antique restorations (sowing machines, harvesters, cash registers), general machines (parking meters, intercoms, slot machines) and, of course, car restorations.
If you're not familiar with The Charismatic Voice, the official story is that it's a youtube channel where a vocal coach technically analyzes the vocals of various singers. The viewers are watching to learn more about the art of singing. That's the official story. In actuality, viewers are watching because she may be the most expressive person in history and every other person in the world is a lifeless robot by comparison.
I look upon the rash of youtubers watching/listening to classic pop culture "for the first time" with complete suspicion. The Charismatic Voice supposedly grew up listening to classical music and so she's never heard "Kashmir" (or Jethro Tull, or Rush, etc). Is it a scam? Is she faking? Is she on drugs? You decide for yourself, I choose to believe she's simply one of God's most wonderful creations.
Happy Don Beveridge Day. It's the 24th anniversary, this year, of his famous Customerization Seminar.
Among the choices of celebration - getting into bagels, eating Dunkin' Donuts, getting smoothies or ice cream, I will probably push the Whopper Button. It's also how I celebrated last year, I'm pretty predictable.
Israel... the Holy Land. Usually I start with some facts about the particular country. Paradoxically, Israel is so full of history, it's difficult to come up with anything. Therefore I will default to some some cursory, superficial "fun facts" from the packaging.
Israel asked Albert Einstein to be President in 1952. He declined.
The world's first underwater museum is in Caesarea. Visitors dive underwater to see remnants of lighthouses, anchors and pedestals from ancient Rome.
Israel's #1 export is cut diamonds.
There is a Jewish phrase "eats movies" which describes someone being overly dramatic.
And now the snacks...
Review:
Breaking News: The marshmallows taste like marshmallows!
These come in white and pink. The white are purported to be vanilla and the pink to be strawberry. The difference is ever so slight. The pink/strawberry tastes ever so slightly like Frankenberry.
More interesting than the marshmallows is that mascot. Is he supposed to be Willy Wonka or a legally-distinct Willy Wonka lookalike? There is no mention of "Willy Wonka" on the package so probably the latter. Regardless, he looks like a creep!
Review:
Hard pretzel fragments that have been coated with honey mustard flavoring.
I don't have too much to say, the description says everything. And, though highly favoring soft pretzels, I do like the occasional hard pretzel. These are good but they do taste pretty much exactly like Snyder's Honey Mustard and Onion Pretzel Pieces. So if you want to know what these taste like, you can just buy those.
Good but unremarkable.
Review:
Looking at these, you'd think they'd be bland cardboard, like the snack equivalent of Grape-Nuts or something...
And yet they're anything but bland. I was shocked to find they taste like a soy-saucey or tangy bbq. Descriptions fail me but that's the best I can approximate. If this is always what falafel tastes like, my review is certainly stupid but I don't know if this is falafel plus other flavors or just the norm. And it's falafel made with chickpeas rather than fava beans, if that makes a difference.
Visually and texturally they are as bland as you'd expect but, yeah, the taste is a surprise. Pretty crazy. An unexpected Thumbs Up from me.
Review:
This is a chocolate bar but it's a bit unique. It's white chocolate on top and regular chocolate on the bottom and they both sandwich a light vanilla wafer. It's good. But despite the unique construction, I couldn't escape the feeling that it basically tasted like a Nestle Crunch Bar.
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It seems to me this edition is pretty lackluster. I can only conclude, given only this set of snacks, is that the Israeli cuisine is so similar to the American one, that there isn't much novelty to speak of. So not much to day this month, we'll see what happens in the next one.
Well it's here, we've reached the end. How does a discussion of "Rocky" turn into a discussion of "Gilmore Girls?" More importantly, how do I move on from here? What now?
