AT THE SAME TIME...

Probably my favorite moment in the classic "This is Spinal Tap" (or one of my favorite moments) is when we see a showcase of one of Nigel's guitar solos:

His playing of two guitars at the same time and then the playing of the guitar with the violin exemplifies everything that it could.

It's attacking the pompous AND the mindless, the "rock as art" AND the "rock as throwaway" all at once. It speaks to ambition and ego and, in short, it's an exact mockery of the entire ROCK AND ROLL mindset (note: that's "rock and roll" in caps).

And by the way my favorite moment in particular is when Nigel suddenly notices the violin isn't quite in tune to his liking and has to fix it.

[As an aside, I have to believe, though there is no proof, that the violin is picked as a reference to Jimmy Page who would sometimes play his guitar with a violin bow. If Jimmy Page can play a guitar with a bow, Nigel Tufnel can play a guitar with a violin.]

Having said that, and looking at how playing two instruments at the same time can be stupid, let's face it, playing two instruments at the same time is generally awesome. I'd love to play ONE instrument at all let alone be able to play multiple.

Which brings me to Johnny Greenwood (guitarist Radiohead) and a video I just rediscovered recently. Greenwood is an extraordinary musician. He's a man who can can play virtually any instrument (or any object that makes some sort of noise), he can compose and score music for orchestras and, of course, he can shread a mean guitar. In this particular live version of "Street Spirit [Fade Out]" he plays both the guitar and the keyboard. Beside the fact that this is impressive by definition, this isn't all that impressive: that is the song is quiet, ethereal and open, there isn't that "100 miles a second" playing on either instrument that turns it into "a feat". But towards the end of the song, the video shows something interesting: he's not just playing the keyboard AND the guitar, he's playing the keyboard WITH the guitar. Rock and Roll.

[Disclaimers: I regret the association between the two linked videos though I felt it unavoidable. I believe "This Is Spinal Tap" mocks everything bad about Rock 'n Roll while Radiohead represent all that is good. I also regret focusing so much on just the multi-instrumentalist portion of the video as it is a perfect rendition of a perfect song and I've probably distracted from it's pure beauty. I also wish to restate that the playing of guitar and piano in the displayed video doesn't represent any circus-trick level of musical prowess. I just think the idea is awesome in itself. In short, this whole post is a mistake and I can't find the delete buttonm. All rights reserved.]

Beat It - The Communist Version

If you think that communism is dead you better think again. Now they're trying to co-opt one of the free world's greatest weapons - the music of Michael Jackson - by claiming that they came up with "Beat It" 30 years earlier.

Watch the official government video made by the Chinese Communist Party and see for yourself.

More intensity. Oddly the Red China military uniform doesn't look that different from Michael's own arm-banded military look. It's also surprising how well the "tai chi" the main dude does go with the music. Actually there is no main dude, they are all equal.

The Many Names of John Anderson

In the MST3K episode "Space Mutiny", Mike and robot companions have a running gag throughout the movie where they give the musclehead protagonist various manly nicknames.

I thought it was so funny, I edited together all the names throughout the movie into a single montage so that I could share it with others. Others had the same idea and uploaded theirs to youtube before I could.

Hilarious. It still cracks me up. Receiving this link in an email today, I wanted to respond with the other time that the MST3K crew did this - the episode that fewer people know about... In the earlier episode "12 to the Moon", the exact same gag was utilized with the beefy male model protagonist of that picture. But, HOLD ON, somehow no video for THIS occurence existed on youtube.

Until now. I uploaded it myself. For the first time ever, I give you "The Many Names of John Anderson":

Maybe We Ain't That Young Anymore

Cemetery Junction (2010)

The first film from writers/directors Stephen Merchant and Ricky Gervais, "Cemetery Junction" has been eagerly anticipated by me for a few years.

Set in England in the 1970's it's a slightly different type of "coming of age" film in which the characters are in their early to mid 20's and not teenagers. Drinking, getting into fights and still living in their home town, they suddenly realize that they're not young anymore and it's time to do something with their lives.

For Merchant/Gervais it's a slight departure in that it's not a straight forward comedy but focuses rather on drama, romance and relationships. It's also, as was already mentioned, not a typical coming of age film as it borrows from "Rebel Without a Cause", "The Apartment" or possibly "Swingers" more so than, say, "The Breakfast Club" but also with some "Saturday Night Fever" thrown in (or so I'm told). It's also a departure as neither Ricky or Steve plays one of the main characters though Ricky has a bit part, Steve has a small cameo and there is even a (brief) appearance by Karl Pilkington.

It's quite a good movie and although it took a while to get into, by the end I was quite into the characters and story. The soundtrack is a big factor - the climax of the movie feature's Led Zeppelin's "The Rain Song" played over the film in its entirety. Ralph Fiennes is quite good as usual and Emma Watson ("Punch-Drunk Love", "Equilibrium", "Synecdoche, New York") gives another understated but excellent performance.

Although it's better than 99% of everything that comes out of Hollywood I can sort of see why it wasn't released in the US and I've had to wait for this long for it to come out on DVD. The thick British accents get to be quite hard to understand at times and I, yes even I, was reduced to turning on the closed captioning. Still, it's a non-issue if you're used to reading subtitles on the occasional foreign film.

It's a little bit unfair to how good the movie is and how much work and effort it took to make but the movie itself is a little overshadowed by the Director's Commentary which is one of the funniest DVD commentaries I've ever heard. As a Gervais/Merchant fan it's probably to be expected but they are hilarious in their ridiculous banter. The only funnier commentary that comes to mind is the "This Is Spinal Tap" commentary where the band all discuss the movie in-character but that's a high standard to reach.

All in all, a 9 out of 5.

GET TO THE CHOPPER!!!

Reality shows mar the landscape like bird poop on a field of statues. However, there is one show that represents everything that "reality television" can be (and should be) when all of the stars align and everything is perfect.

"American Chopper" (now called "American Chopper: Senior vs. Junior") premiered last week and within the first five minutes of the first episode I had a surge of adrenaline like the Phillies were about to play a playoff game. This has a great deal to do with the fact that the show format starts off with "last season on 'American Chopper'" and what happened last season was a giant blowout between father and son where Paul Jr. was fired.

But part of it, too, is that judging by the first episode, "American Chopper" is everything reality television can be. Truth is funnier and stranger and more interesting than fiction but most reality shows fail to recognize this and do the exact opposite: take the veneer of reality and script/edit/manipulate it to a bloody pulp. The result - as in my bird analogy - as we've all seen is crap. "American Chopper", when it works, is more like watching sports than episodic television or a sitcom. You care about the characters, you wonder what's going to happen next, you wait with bated breath to see whether they will succeed or fail. And yet, you can't escape the drama and tension - you can't step outside the three walls and simply think that the "writers aren't going to end it that way"; there are no writers, there is no predictable outcome. And you can't dismiss the tension by reminding yourself that "it's just a movie"; it's real people with real problems that can really fail or triumph, they live and breath and can really get hurt. There are no unrealistic twists, no bad actors, no poor sets or cheap special effects. The characters are three dimensional, the action is unpredictable and there are no dei ex machina.

Early last season Paul Jr. was (quite shockingly) fired from a company that he helped create and the television show that documents said company completely flew apart in all directions. The show had always been about the father-son relationship as well as making bikes but after the battle there was no relationship. The plot split in two (Junior/Senior) where Junior thought about starting a boutique (see, you can't write that) and Senior was left to make bikes however he wanted with no real creative process. It turns out that a weekly show about two guys not talking to each other while a drab bike gets built smoothly and easily can be pretty boring and the show was cancelled after it's first truly bad season.

Now, with a lawsuit still pending, Paul Jr. has decided to start up his own shop in direct competition with his father and former business partner. And to help him, he's bringing in a few other former OCC employees that fans of the show will surely recognize - namely Vinny and Nubs. While fans of the show will surely remember these guys, for those who don't, it's like if Mr. T and Hulk Hogan announced that they were going to come back to the WWF for one more tag team match... It would be like that only much less exciting... but then everything in the world is much less exciting than that so my simile is poorly chosen.

But with father and son going head to head, with Paul back designing bikes, with Vinny back building them, with a true underdog vs. Evil Corporation story line, with emotions flaring and people breaking down, with sweet construction montages that include flying sparks, grinding and welding, and as always, really cool motorcycles, it could be an amazing series once again.

It was a little while ago that "Lost" ended and with it a recurring weekly obsession to see the next episode and find out what happens. If the first episode of "American Chopper" is an indication, that terrible torment is back.

Brothers In Arms

Recently Will Ferrell and Jimmy Fallon reminisced about, and played a clip of, the old days where they both were actors on the Canadian soap opera "Jacob's Patience".

Jimmy doesn't even keep a straight face during the setup to the skit.

Oddly, I was recently watching a "Thunderbirds" movie and thinking how strange it was and thinking it was just plain creepy and stupid. This reminds me of that whole "marionette acting" a bit.

Mitchell, Webb, Donald Kaufman?

Thanks to the powers of Netflix, I've recently been going through the British sketch comedy show "That Mitchell and Webb Look". It's actually pretty funny and I'm surprised I'm only now learning about it since it started in 2006 and I've known about David Mitchell ever since he was a panelist on the fantastic quiz show "QI".

I might post a few clips on this blog in future (because, frankly, who's gonna stop me) but I had to at least post this one. If "Synecdoche, New York" were a comedy sketch it would be this. And anything with that description is worth watching.

That Mitchell and Webb Look - The Chiropractor

Guitar Hero 5 : Through the Looking Glass

A quick shoparound for "Guitar Hero 5" reveals that there is a glitch in the matrix large enough to drive a truck through - something that challenges all rules of logic which lie at the foundation of all civilized thought.

If you take out your Analytical Engine, lubricate the gears sufficiently, build up the proper steam and point it to www.bestbuy.com you will find that the game "Guitar Hero 5"(brand new, never used) is selling for $19.99. This is, in itself, not cause for alarm. However, the very same game used, is selling for $29.99. That's right - the game is worth more used than new.

What does it mean? If a game is worth more money used than new, that means that the moment you buy it it instantly increases in value by $10 (a 50% profit). Presumably, the term "used" implies that you have to take the game out and play it or it's not as valuable. Therefore if you wanted to play video games for a living all you need to do is buy as many copies of "Guitar Hero 5" as you can, play them each one by one and sell each copy for $10 more than you originally paid. It's a tough job but you really get a great sense of accomplishment at the end of the day.

If you buy "Guitar Hero 5" and are unhappy with it, and you wish to return it, what happens? They'll offer to give you your money back but that's a ripoff, they're trying to buy back the game for $10 less than it's worth. "Hey man," - you'll say to the Best Buy employee - "don't act like this thing isn't worth more money, this game is used. You owe me my original twenty bucks for the game plus 10 bucks for improving the game to a 'pre-owned' state."

And just in case you thought that we hadn't gone through the looking glass, that the Earth is still rotating on its axis, that pi is actually a constant and that this whole thing is just a big misunderstanding - that the old man Best Buy had made a mistake typing numbers into his abacus and that the fabric of our universe isn't pulling at the seams... Here's the Amazon.com listing:

[Click the picture for larger version]

Still not huddled naked in the basement? YOU THINK THIS IS A GAME?! Yeah, well, yeah, I mean, technically it is a game but how does this taste on your Cocoa Puffs... here's the same game on GameStop:

God help us all.