Game Grumps - WWE 2K19

 This is just goofy fun.

I love that it's a full 16 minutes of set-up for 5 seconds of wrestling.

Popcorn In Bed - Clear and Present Danger

 "Clear and Present Danger" is a classic, as far as I'm concerned. There are so many lines that have stuck with me for these 30 years.

The Rhode Island Rocky

 A while back a bunch of youtubers boxed each other for charity. I officially had 0 interest except that Arin from Game Grumps decided to do it and then, on the day of, I got hooked in and found it pretty compelling.

Arin's opponent was Harley from the channel "Epic Meal Time." I officially know nothing about that channel but he made a mini-series about his training and the experience of going into this "amateur boxing" event. I'm extremely surprised at the quality of the series, it's so well done and so compelling. Here are all 4 episodes:

He can't keep getting away with it!

PS - Apparently I'm not real people. I'm mutant people.

The Charismatic Voice - Barracuda

 

Pressure Washing Videos are a Sleeping Giant

 There is an entire genre of pressure washing/power washing videos on Youtube and I find it even more enjoyable than the Restoration and Carpet Cleaning genres. The problem is: the videos produced aren't as good.

Pressure washing videos tick all the boxes of the previous two genres: both the "things going from disorder to order" and the "oddly satisfying" boxes as well as also claiming to be ASMR - I'll address  that later. There are also a few channels that add "charity" to the list - they do work for free and then sometimes get the owner's reaction and thanks. Look at the above video for one example.

The dirt peeling off the concrete in a clean line is something I could watch for hours, like I said, it's potentially my favorite genre so far. But it's also not a mature genre and that's the major downside. When you look at Restoration videos, they've discovered a strict set of rules that they all adhere to in order to maximize the pleasure of the viewer (and therefore their own profit). Carpet Cleaning, as I addressed in that post, is less well defined but there's at least one good channel out there. Pressure Washing is the least defined and it is to the point that there isn't even a single great channel. The video lengths range from 4 minutes to 1 hour, there are different types of audio, different styles of editing and different goals.

The #1 thing no one agrees on is audio. What should the audio of a pressure washing video be? Some people label it ASMR and strictly give the sound of the Pressure Washer. The sound of the tools works for Restoration Videos but I don't think it works here; I find the sound of the machinery to be irritating. Some channels seem to agree with me because they mute it all, then just overlay some music - but then it depends on whether you like the music. I've seen one channel that talks over the whole thing, explaining his job and basically turning it into a podcast with pleasing visuals. That's fine, as long as you're looking for a podcast all about pressure washing.

There's also a great diversity in style. Some people (most people?) talk into the camera at the beginning and end to explain the job. Some people intermix the pressure washing footage with lawn care footage (fixing the lawn often goes hand-in-hand with cleaning the walkways). That's unacceptable dilution. One of the best channels I've found (just above) starts his videos with footage of him driving to the site. For me, that's one of the worst things a person could do to ruin the experience - British traffic at 5x speed is a nightmare while I'm trying to relax. And, as previously mentioned, some people end with an "owner's response" which are sometimes sweet but generally underwhelming. It also breaks the people/object separation I explained previously.

Here's my final analysis and my recommendation for a new standard. First, as a viewer, the audio doesn't really matter. Turn on a pressure washing video, mute it and listen to something else that you enjoy - music or a podcast or whatever... then lie down and go into a happy place like it's an Opium Den in the 1800s. Now, for creators, here's the formula that wins the day (except if you're doing charity; in that case, keep doing what you're doing). Minimize addressing the camera (or don't do it at all), minimize talking (or not at all), have before/after footage if you want but keep it short. In short, maximize the percentage of pressure washing footage at all costs and minimize anything else you want to add. Speed up the footage so that it's faster than real time. Compile several jobs together to make videos that are 40 minutes to an hour (or more). That's it. That's the game.

In the end, like I said, there is no One Channel to Rule Them All.

If you'd like to see people washing for charity, check out the related channels: Cabin on the Hill, Lawn Care Juggernaut and The Boring Channel.

For hour-long compilations, check out Bournemoth Jet Washing (though he doesn't appear to make them anymore). Beware of the traffic.

And just another quality channel from another Brit: Flawless Cleaning Services.

The New Norm MacDonald Stand-Up Special is Sad

 Throughout "Norm MacDonald Live" and "Norm MacDonald Has a Show" there is some progression but mostly there is consistency - Norm is Norm. But when you get to his interview with David Letterman on the latter, he suddenly seems to be playing a character. He's a goof, he's a gab, he's almost hyperactive - he's like a child who's had too much sugar.

That same character is back, it seems to me, in Norm's new stand-up special. Knowing he was very sick, but also knowing he couldn't do shows in the pandemic, he recorded a stand-up special in his house which was just released on Netflix. There is no crowd, there is no venue, it is just him and a camera (and a dog and a phone call). It may be because of the silence that he's so animated - he knows, perhaps, he needs to supply the energy that a live audience would normally supply. Or it may be some other reason. Far be it from me to claim to know Norm.

But it is strange and it is a style of stand-up comedy that I've never seen from him. He reminds me of a ventriloquist's dummy (in a good way) - he's all eyebrows, wide eyes and teeth. And, though unusual, it mostly works and there is some great material but there is some lull in there too. It may be that the material is as strong as ever but I'm one of those people who needs to hear audience affirmation, I don't know. And it may be that he just lacked the chance to hone the material on the road in the nightclubs. One thing's for sure, the knowledge that he was ill makes the amount of energy he's putting forth that much more heroic and admirable.

Following the stand-up, Netflix adds on a segment where a group of comedians react to the special and talk about it. Obviously it's impossible to talk about what they've just seen without also eulogizing the man and what he meant. This is, shockingly, my favorite part of the special and I didn't want it to end. Norm was so unique and so enigmatic, it seemed like it could have gone on forever. And I must note, though I don't know where to do it, that Conan addresses the earlier questions I had about Norm not being on Conan's show for many years. He says that Norm was invited but kept turning him down, probably because of his illness. That doesn't completely answer the question for me but there's no reason to re-hash that here.

I may be imagining things, I don't know how to judge my own perception, but it seems to me that at one part of the special Norm gets choked up and emotional. That emotion bleeds into the eulogy segment and I was left feeling sad all over again at the tremendous loss for us and the secret suffering that he went through. And this is the end because I don't know what else to say.